th-cathatesfish.

2012-01-29T20:49:00.002+08:00

sorry blogger.
havent got a chance to update.
first time in so long i actually skipped blogging for a few days.

skipping to day 18 alr k.

Day 18- Plans/dreams/goals you have

so many of those.
where do i start from?

i dont know.

1. prolly wna get into a good uni after graduation. with my gpa, i'd prolly get kicked to no-where ville.

2. save up money for future use. like way ahead.

3. Sell sammy.

4. master fingerstyle guitar and uke so no one will look down on me.

5. Peace.

------------------------------------------------------------

talking about peace.
home sweet home.
well, home's always the best no matter what.
i actually just got home from malaysia.
went to da's house with sean tw and jx for 2 days.
dont really wna talk about it.
ended up going home, crossing over the border. alone.
life really sucks huh.

talk about friday.
went to meet classmates for house visit at yiuwah's.
with biyu yiyan danielle amanda lydia hongwei
and they gambled.
really .
all i can say is.
gambling is bad.
honest.
and then they went to timber for dinner.
pizza and drinks.
i drank apple martini for the first time.
okay it tasted like candy.
and just as i wanted to tell yiuwah how it tasted, there was some crappy burning after taste.
pizza was good , but had to go off early.
felt so blur, i texted yiuwah the wrong thing.
very odd.
i was fine after a warm water bath.
better than breezer from the other time i guess.
i gulped everything and turned red.

alright enough for today.
im really tired.
didnt study much and i feel really, really guilty.
now that there's no more band,
i can put that aside .
just hope i dont think too much about sammy.
really need to focus i guess.

bye.

2012-01-26T13:12:00.001+08:00

Bloody heart breaking k. Living in denial aye? Guess you brought my hopes up for nothing. Screw it. I ought to get shot for this

2012-01-25T20:01:00.001+08:00

Can i just stay here till i expire?

pretty tired of this crap.
i feel lifeless.

take everything. i dont need anything anymore.

2012-01-25T14:57:00.002+08:00

Day 15- Put your iPod on shuffle: First 10 songs that play

okay it's day 15.
im getting sick of this.
its so lame.
not going to give up something so simple anyways.
or else there is really no point in my existence.

1. Better Together- Jack Johnson
2. Because you live- Jesse macartney ( HAHAHA DAREN)
it's been in my songlist for 4 years now. nope, never sick of that gay song he intro-ed.
3. Yellow- Coldplay
4. Some malay song rosalind left in my songlist too. i dont know why i never seem to delete it.
it's been 3 years?
5. Da eum nal - Seungri's solo
6. Only One- yellowcard (HAHAHA DAREN AGAIN)
7. Paperweight from DearJohn
8. Apologise- Pixie Lott
9. She will be loved- Maroon 5
10. Time after time- javier colon

wierd shuffle list.
brings back so much memories,
because basically,
i never EVER remember to remove any unwanted songs.
and i never EVER EVER add any new songs.
so sad life right.
and im like listening to music 20hours everyday?
imagine what kinda crap im listening to huh.
i know.
one fine day i'll just stop listening to music.
someday..

--------------------------------------------------------------
okay i officially got over last night.
too emotional abit ah.
y'know venus texted me out of no where to ask if i were okay.
so sweet right.
rarely have such people popping out at the down side of your life k.
feel so thankful. and much better.

some situation im in ,
just cant be explained or shared with others.
so like yeah, ouch me.
ouch.
feel like shouting.
haha. k im good.
gta go revise abit.
i seem to be drifting away because of MD.
and because i was sick.

god damn it, it's been more than a month hello.
WHY DO I STILL HAVE PHLEGMS.
i feel like coughing and crying.
i dont wanna go to school .
i wna rot at home for life.
and let my mom feed me.
okay i was lying about the feeding part.
im such an ass.
xiyu do you want a freaking future or not?
okay yes i want.

nevermind ~

bye .

2012-01-25T00:02:00.002+08:00

im affected.

im feel so affected.
i feel broken ,
the emotional pain just cant be explained.
why do i feel like this?
just because i cant put it to words, doesnt mean i havent got any feelings.

the feeling of betrayal or loneliness or something.
i constantly seek answers but tend to beat up on myself,
even if i could no longer make whatever it was that broke my heart.
comforting myself feels useless, or makes things even worse.
cos i tend to just push myself back into the position that i left.

where the hell am i going?
wish there was a helping hand.

im tired of waiting..

2012-01-24T15:22:00.000+08:00

SO CUTE I CAN DIE.
really forever alone.
im like watching kitty clips on CNY.
hurhur ~

2012-01-24T14:58:00.004+08:00

Day 14- A picture of you and your family

ignore the arms please.
my dad's so handsome.
kthxbye.

---------------------------------------------------------------

MD yaw!

haha, trumpet section squeezing in the mini mirror in the dressing room .
literally squeezing.

so scary.
if you see it, you poop bricks.
k no lah. kidding.
so obvious.

ok so stay at home day tonight.

i finally finished my PLJ.

i dont know why my essays are ever short now a days.

sum ting wong.

but yeah.

518 words k.

enough. yaaayyy.

yeah. today's open house ah.

so my dad and sister's friends are coming over.

yawnn.

forever alone ah. bye. ):

k no. tmr stay at home part 2 !

yayyy!

need to catch up on alot of stuffs.

- dreamweaver

- bunkering

- econs

- gened project and ya da yada yada.

okay.

just hope i wont be alone this evening k.

k bye.

2012-01-23T23:40:00.002+08:00

dont think anyhow k.

Day 13- A letter to someone who has hurt you recently

i dont know.
no one actually hurt me.
i dont know really.
im not the kind that bears grudges

so ,
dear so-so .
i wished we'd still keep in contact for a long long long time.
and i wished the friendship , relationship, and all the ships we had werent so fragile.
just because of our differences, doesnt mean we should distant ourselves.
maybe we just met at the wrong point of our lives,
but it wont make things any worse.

so yep,
no grudges .
no blaming no hurting no nothing,
i just wished things would be the same.
):

------------------------------------------------
okay today was a long day.
got up real early and went to the columbarium to visit mama.
really missed her alot, and wished she's still be here to celebrate CNY with us.
went back to the house, and it was rather empty.
no happiness no nothing, the atmosphere just felt so still.
jeez..

okay and then we went back home in the afternoon.
and i took a nap.
more than a power nap.
i slept like 4 hours . now im freaking awake k.
haha.
and then we went to my mom's side for dinner.
ended up eating junk and was too full for rice.
my grandpa like blur when he found out.
haha so cute right.
dont really know how to communicate with them.
wish i could tho..

okay so we got home .
and i slacked.
ok fine. i admit.
every CNY's the same.
it's my 17th year and im kinda sick of it alr.
/:
yawnss.
sad night tonight ah.

haha.
k bye.(:

2012-01-23T01:41:00.002+08:00

Day 12- How you found out about Blogger and why you made one

hmm.
didnt really know much about blogger
and used to think it was dumb, cos i didnt get the idea of an online ''diary''
for the fact of the the countless attempts creating diary entries
maybe like after 2 entries the book will turn to junk.

so yeah i found blogger in 2007, when i was in sec 1.
and this blog has been constantly updated.
i admit i used to update crap.
im no better now, talking to myself and everything.
at least it's self entertainment k.
not sure if im going bonkus tho.

made a blog myself cos i wanted to be like huijuan.
we were then, blogging crap.
like , today so boring, i go school then go home slack. then bye kinda thing.
felt cool then.
and there was this tagboard thing remember?
it still exists but i removed mine cos it attracts attention.
and partly cos ppl read but dont comment or tag or anything.
which makes me feel like a sad person and a loner talking to myself.
so basically im living in self-denial aye?
yer think?

yeah and this was called dagalwif-a-brokensmile.bs
now i remember.
haha dayummm.
so although i changed links and whatnot cos i thought i'd be happy from then on and i was wrong,
nothing much else changed.
and the previous blog designs i had were basically creditted to huijuan and her sis.
smart ppl.
rmb about this egg blogskin, and some dumb tortoise blogskin.
and the recent one with the plain orange and white background created by huijuan's sis.
yep i loved that the most till i act smart and tried editing the stuff myself and deleted it by accident.
im so stupid. seriously.
so was forced to change to the norm blogskin from blogger.
yawns.
k done

------------------------------------------------------------------------

long day today.
i woke up at 1plus in the afternoon.
felt so naise to finally sleep till im done sleeping.
instead of having to be woken up.
stupid incomplete feeling.

and yeah i watched desperate housewives5 marathon.
sooo addicted.
it's so awesome.
like the only drama series i'll go for.
if u know me,i dont actually watch much teevee or get glued.
but shit happens occasionally.
and peeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwww. i threw the spring cleaning aside.
i watched it till 4pm.
so awesome.
every sunday have eh.
watch it with cousin last week.
she's glued to anything tho.
hope i rmb about it next sunday.

and then i started to spring clean.
within 2 hours i was done.
cool or wad.
im so cool ikr.
my room is neat.
yaaaay.
new bed sheet and stuff.
and i found ALOT of coins when i cleaned up.
now my cow box is half full.
im so positive right.
i said half full, not half empty.
k i should shut up.
i think it's because im real tired now.
like the using up all energy plus hyper part before i KO?
yep that part.
heh.

okay and went to eat dinner at longjohnsilver's
reunion dinner? hahaha.
so wierd. and the theater was empty.
loners.
movie was alright.
and went to walk around for awhile.
i feel like eating sweets now im so tired.
k back. sweeetts.

ok so going out tmr i guess.
CNY's not really my thing.

ahh too tired.

k bye.

2012-01-22T00:43:00.004+08:00

Day 11- Another picture of you and your friends

juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust niceee.

k these are the only MD pictures i have now.

MD is OVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEERRRRRR!

and it was better than i expected (:

i feel complete.

can leave in peace ah.

haha

jingyi and i

nora and i !

in nun clothing. hahaha

the pass with a freaking typo.

such a turn-off ! ):

like so memorable, then fail.

k try spotting the error.

soo. yes. MD is over.

really great great great great experience.

so many stuff happened.

cant mention all but i'll try.

so, began the day skipping stats lesson.

because i had LOA.

y'know the moment i didnt come, everyone started telling me that i've got alot to catch up.

i am dead.

will try my best to catch up during this break.

i promise myself.

headed for the band room and got everything moved.

took a bus there.

was so amazed by the dressing room.

it's so classy! hahaha.

but trumpet section in that mini room is a big nono right.

still managed to squeeze tho.

there was a toilet in the dressing room!

like umm.. 19 peeps plus alumnis sharing the room.

yep.

the dressing room's like half of a normal bedroom.

but still, imagine if you're the soloist or performer or smth.

it's lika boss kinda thing.

sorry, mountain tortoise here.

*waves hand*

actually remember performing at the NUS hall or smth in sec 3.

SPH isit? forgot. and they had bigger dressing rooms.

it was cool too, but like all the girls to one room and i was busy screaming then.

so yeah.

okay we had approximately 4 hours of break.

i mean i .

wth right.

went to slack at marina. really too free.

and we had so much time to shop for kwangyi and shimin's present.

i was so tired already then.

about 1pm?

yes. sleepy already.

and i already had bloodshot eyes by then.

so yumyumyum had short rehearsals.

i expected the hall to be bigger actually.

until i went on stage and like, k big enough. im scared.

so yeah,

i got a message from huimei that both thweni and her werent coming for the concert.

they paid for it alr tho.

felt so unsupported i could cry.

thats like 1/4 of my pillar.

really like to thank da, rosalind ( WOO ROSALLINNND!!!) , sean timmeh, sis , sis, mom and dad for coming. really appreciated it alot. (':

wish stuffys were there tho

and yeah dad finally came back to singapore after a month at india.

feel so relieved that he's safe.

rather awkward with him now.

dont know if i've changed or what.

i dont know really..

okay so yeah the performance started,

and minghui marvin asyraf and i only played at the 5th song.

so we went back to the dressing room to slack.

i honestly like the tuba peep's section piece.

so naisseeeee!!!!!!!!

wished they played it for me at korea on my birthday.

hahaha, k sorry.

anw. we had alot of fun back there.

cos there was this spotlight thingy.

and it was damn bright and hot.

i think i got blinded like 4 times.

sad life me.

and it was super .______________________________________________.

i was afraid i wouldnt sound flat.

and the room was dark.

so i saw this shiny trumpet and thought, oh well. just warm sammy up.

after 15 mins marvin disturbed me about warming sammy up.

and he said, sekali it's not urs.

and then im like, haha.

and then i looked at the saliva key.

OMG IT'S REALLY NOT MINE .

it was marvin's.

wthlolomgwtsbbqafk.

life sucks sometimes huh.

okay the performance went well, to me.

i didnt have much stage fright.

couldnt really see the audience.

and i liked to play the encore.

feel so proud of myself honestly that i didnt make much booboos

and life really sucks.

im like leaving and ending my passion.

and i finally learnt how to single tongue very fast.

._.

oh btwbtw,

there was an interval and i went to find them.

and da sean and rosalind stayed inside.

wth. inside no reception. i couldnt contact them.

i called dad and he said he lost mom and sis.

and i called sis she didnt pick up.

like so sad eh.

im like lost sad emo forever alone sheep.

everyone around me met up with their loved ones and stuff.

i stood in the middle of no where stonning.

sad person.

and then they had the last call that interval was over,

i finally spotted sis.

she chose to buy cookies and eat instead of finding me.

OMG. im so embarrassed.

after the concert i met up with da and sean.

and my mom was right, the safety pin will give way and pierce through me.

ok it didnt pierce through me thank god.

thank you so much.

i caught the safety pin that snapped on time and ran to the bathroom.

pheeww.

joel called and i met up with him.

JOEL FAN. the skinny tall stick guy.

ok it was rather wierd cos he was with kwangyi.

joel was my SL in sec sch, and kwangyi's my current.

and they were tgt.

and they both know weijuan, my pri school SL.

and all of them know the infamous angeline(MOM)

small world huh!

ok most importantly they know me k.

(: teeehee

okay so it ended and i didnt get to see rosalind ):

went supper with da.

not really.

he ate his dinner and i KO-ed beside his fries.

so sleepy eh.

my eyes were like bloodshot and small.

and i nearly fell asleep walking .

we hanged around till like 2am.

feel so tired still now

cos tooooooooooodaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy.

woke up early to meet da for shopping.

CNY shopping yah right.

he said to meet up early and whatever.

and he was late.

for like 1 and a half hours.

idiot guy .

ok and he gave me un-bear-ables gummies from the natural confectionary.

hahaha

so.. we went to walk around and buy his clothes.

you've got to listen to this.

all i bought was a mini sheep eraser from smiggle.

cos da bought this pencil cup for his pencils. -.-

and then the sheep were at the counter display.

couldnt resist . really.

i literally jumped and everything .

soo cuteeeee.

ok da bought it for me.

haha. and his expression like -_-

liar. he still played with it.

and we walked and we walked .

IM SO TIRED.

we didnt finish walking cos it rained

couldnt go to orchard central on time,

we wanted to buy couple shoe at VANS.

guess we'll give it a miss.

didnt send cousins off.

i miss them already.

they'll be back in august.

must meet up with them ):

all da's fault.

shop shop shop.

tsk. hahaha ok no.

i said it myself that i wanted to accompany him

and we went to meet my family for reunion dinner.

he came too omg.

haha. awkward a lil.

and yeah. quite full cos we ate junk before dinner.

whoops. okay after dinner we went back to my house.

da and i slacked. we played benny(uke) and the guitar.

like crazy.

we just crapped. and played.

quite fun tho.

first time im not sleepy or bored or anything.

and he ate the cookie that sis bought.

it was for me. >:[

ahwell.

okay so my dad sent him home.

and tada im here .

whoa very long post.

thought we were going to...

ah nevermind.

let it be . (:

2012-01-22T00:34:00.002+08:00

Day 10- Songs you listen to when you are Happy, Sad, Bored, Hyped, Mad

crap. i think i skipped a day.
):
k this is for yesterday.
so i can answer 2 questions teehee.

hmm.
Happy- english pop songs/emo songs.
sad- violin pieces/rock/ instrumental band songs
bored- english pop songs/emo songs
hyped- emo songs/ instrumental songs
mad- put the earpiece on and off the ipod.

yep. that's me for your info.

2012-01-19T11:18:00.002+08:00

DAY9: SOMETHING PROUD I DID IN THE PAST FEW DAYS. I JUST FINISHED MY PRESENTATION YAW. YAYYYY. literally lifting one of the boulders off my chest. Just proud of myself i didnt die. Having band tonight, so wont be blogging. So scared eh tmr MD alr. Sammy, please sell yourself I beg you. ): i feel so stressed out now. Urgh. K bye

The Lion King - Can You Feel The Love Tonight

2012-01-18T22:45:00.000+08:00

aww (,: rosalind will cry if she watches this.
commmfem

2012-01-18T21:00:00.002+08:00

okay.
so ITB's over.
there wont be any such stupid test with the laggy comps in our comp lab.
seriously, even sec school's better.
they should've just let us use our own laptops and do the lockdown browser thingy.

and everyone was super pissed .
idk. i like some happy idiot in the middle.
cos it was funny.
i mean like dont panic and everything and you wont be pissed at yourself.
so yeah. nazeer sat beside me. and sebas.
and it was hilarious.
cos he like gave up, and went twitter.
whud?? hahhaha okay lah at least he attempted abit in the end.
and amirul sat infront.
he was like blur as well.
and y'know what he did?
he just copy the demo sample of the qn and pasted.
so cool uh haha.

and i have presentation tmr most probably.
im going to die ):
okay lah not so bad.
stage fright? IM OVER IT BABEH.
im gna perform at esplanade. nth can make me scared-er.
OKAY IM LYING. SOMEBODY HELP ME PLEASE.
):
howhowhowhow okay later practice.
i talk to teddy.
he listens and he smiles .
even if u beat him.
cute guy.
ok bye.

TRUMPET HOW.
FML. (fries make lies)
):

2012-01-18T11:56:00.002+08:00

DAY8: SHORT GOALS FOR THIS MONTH AND WHY

so obvious right

1. Get well soon.

Ive been sick for nearly 3 weeks now and i still have phlegm in my lungs.
its really affecting me.

2, Find a buyer for Sammy. im desperately freaking out by now.
i think of him in my dreams.

3.Get MD over and done with.

hopefully it would be a great experience. that would be fulfilling the stupid PLJ as well.

4. Get on track with studies.

i seem to be so distracted and everything these days.
gna catch up during the CNY period.
MUST.

-------------------------------------------------------------

okay done.
having fireworks test later.
*crossfingers*
gna be damn relieved once it's over.
its at 320.
so duh i woke up late today.
like finally.
couldnt have a good sleep for the past few days since ..
okay since last tues night.

the phlegms are so irritating btw.
it's like stuck deep down and i have cough real hard and real bad for it to come out.
eeeeeee.
k.
gna do work now.

jaron not coming for the concert.
idiot guy.
but sean's coming instead.
woohoo!~
bet he'll like say its boring.
and when he was bored the last time, he started shouting ''john'' and ''dick''
instead of my name.
so sad right. k fine.

da asked me to go shopping with him on saturday.
you kidding me?!
the thing i hate the most to do with him is shopping.
HE'S SO BORING.
not him being bored. as in him being a bore.
he'll walk in to a random shop. say wow. look at the shorts and say, ok no.
then walk out.
he'll just end up at top man .
*yawnn.*
shall just pull him direct to top man and dump him there huh.
heh heh.
but i hate crowds. ):
everyone, like him, is gna shop for last minute stuff.
poor me.

k bye.

2012-01-17T16:02:00.004+08:00

Day 07- A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

hmm.
i guess it'll be that cheese face below.
(left)

well, i guess it's cos it's both of our first relationship.
which makes it worse.
HAHA.
i mean, yeah.
c'mon man, i thought he was nice, un-gay, a fine gentlemen, respectful and humble.
turns out he was none of the above k.

and , if you knew me right from the start, you'd know.
i was hot and short tempered, childish (VERY), vulgar, loud, scream-y, impatient and stuff.
till i met him. i guess i had to stop.
and realised everything wasnt about me afterall.( duh )
omg i was so stupid. so embarassing.

and bladdy hell, looks can be so deceiving k.
dont fall for it.
not like i thought that he was handsome.
eww. gay.
that ass is so hot tempered as well.

im not saying im good now.
i am not , obviously.
but at least he changed me to be a better(slightly) person.
and gave me a better perspective of the rest of the world.
and his acceptance and impatience and gay-stuff.
the other day i was feeling rather bad for us,
cos we hardly meet anymore these days, including the holidays.
and he promised to meet up often.
and he kept it.
i love him.

so gna embarass him now.
milk face.
thank god im keeping my own milk-mouth face.

im from the forces of eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeviiil ~

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

i overslept today.
omg. i think i didnt even set my alarm last night.
i was so tired i KO-ed on my bed at 12plus.
i really cant take it having band on mondays omg.
i have school at 8am the next morning.
plus school starts at 8am on monday as well.
urgh. i hate this.
okay so yeah i couldnt wake up.
biyu called me at 720 .
instant resuscitation.
okay no. haha.

okay dreamweaver sucks.
really gna work on it.
so restless and exhausted and bored , i practically gave up for 2.5 hours of IT just now.
ended up listening to sungha jung. awesome guy.

initially went to fc3 with biyu amanda and yiyan this afternoon.
saw someone. and the the seats were so close,
i begged to go somewhere else.
k wtvs.

im so tired.
and i just altered my MD gown myself !
hope it's not too obvious cos it's really huge ):
and i really need to sell sammy now.

so many things running through myhead...
feel like im gna blow up.

1. SAMMY. *priority* by this friday.
2. Extra MD ticket cos jaron's not going. urgh.
3. Fireworks
4. Dreamweaver
5. Port Ops chapter 9
6. Stats chap13
7. Econs chap7
8. Polish sammy.
9. Pack room. DAD'S COMING HOME THIS FRI

bye

2012-01-16T13:04:00.002+08:00

DAY 6: FAVOURITE SUPERHERO. THORRRRRR!!!! So easy. Cos he's hot. As in the movie thor. Not the pathetic comic. Heard there's a second movie coming out. So hurrayyyy! *gives eye brows* okay. Having band tonight. Gna be so tired i need to promise myself to wake up for the 8am class for dreamweaver or i am dead. Having IT test on friday. So sad ): okay suddenly feel so excited for the concert. Eh. Forgot to mention my sheep hair is gone. Amanda says i look like cleopatra. And i was like wuddd. Felt a lil oconplimented at first. Then i googled images for cleopatra and $&@!?&$?#% so ugly. Hahaha. K bye

2012-01-15T20:32:00.002+08:00

hahaha
yeahhhh. (Y)

learnt the beggining verse of more than words on guitar.
now my pinky is purple.
wts.
butttttttttttttttttttt.
yayayyayyay

now i wont have to feel like sleeping when da plays that song.
usually i'll like yawn.
and stuff. cos it's really boring.
and he says its romantic.
ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
k. haha
suddenly feel like laughing at that cheese face.

okay bye.

2012-01-15T15:41:00.003+08:00

DAY 5 : Picture of where i've been too.

okay i've lost the taiwan and hongkong pics.
so yeah.

this is korea with the band peeps.

and this is in phuket.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

k . i am sooooooooooo frustrated.
cousin's like blasting music.
and using my itouch.
and complaining she wants to go swimming.
omggggg.
._.

k quick go home.
i need to study.
im so tired.
slept at 6am cos i spent the whole night talking to claire.
the other cousin.
okay it was kinda fun.
but i dont rmb knocking out.
haha.
oh, and gail jumps on my teddy all the time.
feel like crying.
and it's so friggin hotttttttttt.

btwbtwbtw,
i bought han this angel iphone cover.
angel as in , stich , but pink.
so gay.
and i spend my entire life savings . honest.
and then jess tweet me.
Y'KNOW WHATTTTTTTTT.
she bought the same cover as i did.
and gave it han as well.
it was stitch.
i feel like kicking han zomg.
my monehhhh.

hahaha .
and we bluff bluff friend her .
me and jess bluff bluff friend her only.

so tired.
):
and troubled.
sammy has to go now.
really.
im left with $1.40
for the next month because i bought tickets for my family.
i even bought one extra for you.
but nevermind i guess, dad's gna come for it.

bye

Adele- Don't You Remember

2012-01-14T14:04:00.001+08:00

...

2012-01-14T13:07:00.001+08:00

Trying to live without you.

2012-01-14T12:26:00.004+08:00

DAY 4: A HABIT I WISH I DIDNT HAVE.

SO MANY.
umm.
1. procrastination?
like now?
cos i have stupid ITB test on wednesday.
and i got STUCK.
so sad right.

2. Having to be in bed at least 2 hours before i fall asleep.

3. Habit of being sticky to certain people. which is not good.

4. Habit of forgetting to smile at times.

5. Biting my lips when im nervous.
haha it used to be the reason why my front teeth protrudes.
and then i joined band, and it was okay alr.

okay .
so . i have stomach flu now.
damn it xiyu. wth cant you get better.
i think i have blogged for at least 2 weeks that im sick.
whatever seriously.
okay why i am i whatever-ing myself.
): i feel so sad.

okay met up with da , sean, jx, tw, bk, and eryan.
sorry and HAN.
i forgot. i think. hahaha
yeah and we went to fish and co .
the longest meal i ever had i think.
seriously.
we sat down for like 30 mins.
wait for jx, and then han came.
and then wait for the orders for 20 mins.
and then jx sean they all went to the atm for 20 mins.
and then we ate for like 1 hour
i drank water, and when i started on my pasta i was full alr.
da ended up eating my serving as well.
oink. (O:
okay yah,and now i have tummy upset.
oh, and we went to the park and went home.
their so called lepak.-.-

then da and i went to sit down and drank milk.
hahaha.
milk= beer k.
rmb watching kogepan at the poolside.
oh well.
(O_O) <-- kogepan's face.
and i then i went home.

today's a long day.
cos im going over to grandma's house later.
it's her birthday today.
my grandparent's birthdays are on random days really.
no lah, its like according to the chinese calendar.
ok so after that my cousins are coming to stay over.
the claire and gail thing.
they're leaving next week.
but i seriously need to study.
need to entertain that lil brat.
cute brat.
she sleeps later than me k. wth.

ok bye.

2012-01-13T09:29:00.011+08:00

DAY 3: Picture of Me and My Friends.

Band peeps in Korea !

Year1 class peepss

Pictures can hor?

i never cheat wad.

MY ROSALIND <3

MELCAMP

4e2 !

Last day of school! chleo and huijuan

BVMB stttttsttttttt.

Artpeepss

3e2 (:

okay done.

feel so emotional.

damn it.

get a hold of yourself woman.

2012-01-12T16:26:00.001+08:00

Day 2: Meaning behind my blog name.

Okay. So my blog's called th-cathatesfish right?
cos i used to play with some fat orange cat in sec2.
Initially my blog url was dagal-wif-brokensmile or smth.
I forgot where the - was placed.
And well, i met that cat.
And i bought cat food , tuna flavour, for it and it didnt like.
Waste my money damn it.

Oh. And chleo started calling me grey.
I forgot why.
Grey is her fat cat at home.
Perhaps cos i was/is fat.
And i hate fish.
So yes, here you go.
Day 2 of the 30day challenge. (:
im like typing this on my itouch now cos i just finished the test,
and i have no where to go till i meet da at 530 and then have band at 630pm.
So sad right.
And yeah.

Have got mixed feelings now,
cos i dont know what's on your mind and what you're thinking about.
I keep thinking it the wrong way. Hello, im not dirty minded.
As in wrong.
Meaning, i cant forget about us k.

Okay yah feeling so sleepy.
And im still sick ):
poor me.
Cant wait for concert.
Bye.

ADELE - 'Make You Feel My Love'

2012-01-11T22:03:00.000+08:00

aww. )':
all time favourite since sec2.
i feel for her...

and she's so pretty k !
no perfect body or whatever but who cares.
pretty.

i love her.
k bye

2012-01-11T19:14:00.005+08:00

DAY 1 : Picture of myself and 15 interesting facts about me.

ok this is damn recent.
honest.
about 13 years ago?
:}

okay facts facts.

1. i am indeed, very good in chinese.
2. i love animals. especially huge dogs and sheep.
3. i love sheep so much, i have sheep hair, sheepy pencil case, sheep converse shoes, and a sheep shirt, and of course wooly undies (O:
4. I talk to myself , alot. When im blogging, when im studying, when im watching teevee, and with friends, when no one responds.
5. I love music. Have played, or attempted and failed the following:
- trumpet (current)
- ukulele
- guitar
- violin (fail)
- e-flat horn
- cornet in eflat
- cornet in bflat
- flugelhorn
- euphonium
- recorder ( HAHAHA)
6. I dont sing. I dont sing anywhere. Not even in the shower, because im afraid the neighbours will hear.
7. I have spoilt approximately 11 earpieces/headphones/earphones in my entire life. and counting.
8. I like the colours brown, orange, red. and brown.
9. I am EMO, and i rot and stone.
10. My natural expression is literally ._. because others say i look sad. and that's because im stonning. and i have small eyes.
11. I dont use vulgarities anymore. At least no F-words and such. I stopped because i thought i had to grow up. no link right? okay, there are exceptions still.
12. People laugh when i attempt to joke. Not because im funny, but because of my stupidity.
13. I bite when i cry.
14. My ambition is to be a veterinarian.
15. ~~I like stuffys.~~ eh dont bother google-ing please. haha.

Phe-ew. done.
k so satisfied that i got to stay at home.
i love rotting.

2012-01-11T19:12:00.002+08:00

HOLY MOLLLLLLLLLY!
haha.

k so random.
used to think that ppl that did 30 day challenges were stupid.
then i think.
i actually blog everyday -.-
not so stupid alr k. so yay.
and i guess it'll give a better idea of who i am?
rather than some person whom talks to herself.
okay yes. i am a person that talks to myself k.

2012-01-11T15:46:00.003+08:00

so drowsy.
yes im still sick.
and i feel bad.
no i feel worse.
i keep coughing.
just wish i can ask myself to shutup k.

i attempted to play sissy's guitar.
apparently i failed.
i blue-blacked my own ring finger.
i dont know why.
so pain k. ):
you and me by lifehouse is a nice song.
): damn it.

okay.
so i went to school for awhile just now.
and bought soap on the way home.
yay soap ! (O:

today's danielle's birthday.
why is everyone so old.
so many january babies.
no fair.
happy birthday danielle ! (:
hope she get 4.0 all the way k.
haha

having band tmr again.
think we're playing jap grafitti 14.
hmm. prefer the disney's tho.
oh well.
feeling so sick ):
damn it.

ok lah bye

2012-01-10T22:55:00.003+08:00

hai.
so sleepy.
and im still sick.
yah boring.
im sick, next day sick, and still sick.
ikr.
feel so stupid today cos i keep coughing.

okay ,
so.
i skipped IT lesson today.
feel so bad.
promise to catch up tmr.
cos i took the mini flu meds last night.
the yellow super drowsy one y'know?
and i slept at 1 plus last night.
so i couldnt wake up at 630am.
duh?
yeah im so mean :{
at least i made it for econs and port ops just now.

met da after that
he wasnt late, for the first time.
so proud of him.
coughs.
first time.
in 2.5 years k.
and we went to baskin robins to eat icecream.
he kills me lor.
brought me to kfc last weekend.
and now icecream.
and i ate spaghetti.
and meatballlllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll.
crazy guy. and he made me cry.
cos he scold me. so stupid.
hahaha.
ended up cursing each other again.

haha
okay actually i think im having a fever.
): feel hawwwwt.
thanks thanks.
*vomits*

okay lah.
gna do proj tmr for awhile in school.
bet we'll finish in half an hour to an hour.
so yeah.
so sleepy.

zzz.
mixed feelings k.
gna forget about it.
i feel not okay now.
so how?

bye.

2012-01-09T17:00:00.002+08:00

haha cute stalker :P

okay anww.
im back home.
and have to get back to school in an hour.
for band..
band's changed to mon and thurs.
same as someone.
oh well ~

okay umm.
feel sick still today.
especially with the direct aircon and everything.
cant complain hor. ppl in sec sch no aircon.
haha.
so mean.

eh oli got back her results.
and she did well ! to me.
real proud of her.
and hopefully her dad allows sammy !
holy molly.

feel so tired.
._.
okay i went home cos i have no money to eat.
bad state right.
hope sammy will get an owner.
aid me lots lots.

okay bye.

We are the world(Symphonic Prelude)

2012-01-08T18:48:00.000+08:00

omg just randomly clicked on band songs on youtube.
so nerd (O:
k this is like the best song i've ever listened.
listen can cry (,:

rmb bvmb played it during sec3 end of year.
i had the flugelhorn solo.
awwman. really miss that.
but anw we screwed up. hahaha.
as usual. but so memorable k.

2012-01-08T14:07:00.004+08:00

hi.
this is me killing my cousin.

nah kidding.
seriously gna miss her big big time.
her name's claire.
she's 4 years my junior.

jeez.
when we were young,
like p4 and she was like 6 years old,
our family used to hang out alot.
and went on road trips tgt.
and so. my job then, was to entertain her.
she was damn spoilt and everything.
and such a bugger.
but so cute.
but irritating.
ikr. that feeling of having someone killed in your mind,
then after that crying cos you feel bad about it.
okay yeah that's me. im so mean ):
okay so she was real spoilt and everything.
but after she had a sis around 6 years ago, she became better.
and i liked her .
*grins*
ok. sorry. not like loike.
as in loike.
yeah. she's nice and everything now.
too bad it didnt last much.
she's migrating to perth on 20th.
that's like the SPSB concert. and she cant make it.
so yeah.

gna miss that stinking little brat i once knew.
definately.
and well, her lil sis.
she's like hyper and stuff.
so i couldnt grab her to take a pic.
abit scary tho.
like she's an ipad and galaxy tab freak y'know.
holy moly.
like last year when she turned 5,
she had to wear specs.
and it was like 300-400 deg.
freaking scary.
love her tho.

and like at 1am yst da told me he was below my block.
yer kidding?!
so late.
but yeah.
he's been having fun and gaying with his friends
feel so .
speechless.
or smth.
idk lah.
feel like kicking him.
ok i alr did.
and i drove again.
like a hundred meters.

okay now i've got alot of work.
crap. cos i procrastinated.
im so bad !

and yeah. kinda sick still.
it's a lil worse.
i mean, on fri it was like runny nose.
running? runny? k runny cuter.
and now its like clogged. choked. smth.
my boogey's like dark green with a lil blood.
ouch right.
and like my mom scolded me.
for not going to the bathroom to clear my nose.
wth?

da's school starting anw tmr.
he's gna die for sure.
he's like sleeping at like 3-4am everyday.
crazy.
okay bye.

bye claire.
hope she'll be safe and not turn into an australian ah lian.
if it exists.

AND FRANCESCA's COMING BACK TO SPORE THIS SATURDAY.

from perth too. coincidence huh

woohooo!

it's been like 4 years.

cant believe we still keep in contact huh?

im like the only one.

dont know why.

i think im stupid?

haha.

i dont seem to rmb any bad stuff she did to me.

all the back stabbing activities and whatnot.

oh well.

so excited to meet her !

k bye

P.S. when i read the mail i felt like killing myself honestly.

wth am i thinking man. xiyu gta wake up k woman.

clear your mind. plsplsplsplsplsplpslpspslplss.

(*#)*(#*)@*#@

no bad thoughts k.

2012-01-07T12:48:00.003+08:00

okay sorry .

forgot about the blog for at least 24 hours.
anwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

i skipped stats lesson yst cos i felt so sick.
then da asked me out.
asshole. no sense of sympathy or love or anything.
he made me cross over to malaysia , alone.
so freaking scary.
i was so scared, too scared until when he asked if i was scared.
i said, no ._. <--- poker face.
then he was like , oh, okay.
-.-

yeah so we went to buy his lil bro's birthday present.
and then went to buy rice.
and went to his house
to watch tayong dalawa. hahaha.
ok we caught half of it.
and then we went to kfc.
kfc k.
im sick. we went kfc.
and then i died.
k no. then we went for dinner.
and yeah it was okay.
and he drove me home.
omgwthwts.
along the highway he stopped to let me drive.
like so fun k seriously.
apparently the, i wont take my licence until i can afford car thing failed.
omg i want my licence.
ok lah not really. but it was fun tho.
he was like, 60 oni ah. only can drive until 60.
BOOOOOOSSTTTTTTTTTT.
he got so scared. teeeheee.
and then we stopped over to buy m&ms and poop drink.
y'know the yoghurt drink that aids digestion thing.
VERY effective. haha k.

so tired when i got home.
just knocked out.
this morning when i woke up i felt like dying seriously.
my throat hurts big big big time.
thanks to the nuggets huh.
and yeah the peanut m&ms.
i swear the m&ms peeps are cheapos seriously.
they cut cost, and increase price.
i rmb it used to be like 90cents- $1.10.
now sp sells like 1.80?
and the portion like half.
everyone in my class just turns to buy NIPS.
yeah for the fact it sounds wrong.
and the quantity, not quality.
the peanut's like bitter and stuff.
but it's like 90cents, and 4 times as much.
will have the eat-until-dont-wna-eat. A.K.A jaw pain feeling.
yeah i know.
half satisfied.

okay so.
bunkering lecturer reopened the quiz.
thank god seriously.
THANK YOU.
i didnt do 3 quizes out of the total 6.
sucks to be me huh.
the whole holiday i was like OH CRAPPPP FMLFMLFMLFMFLML.
but, phew.

okay results were okay.
generally Bs?
but not satisfying

cousins are coming to stay over tonight.
for the first time, no matter how irritating they can be,
i do want this.
cos they're migrating to australia for good.
on the 20th jan.
so today will prolly be the last time im seeing them.
gna miss them real bad.
okay im like speaking before they come.
perhaps i'll regret it later.
so mean right.
yeah.
one is 5 this year, and the other 14.
sisterss.
but the lil one's cute, but irritating.
everything you ever say, she'll just reply whateverrrrrrrr.
-.-
idiot.
feel like pulling out her teeth.
she's bohhgay now tho.
which makes it even more fun.

ok then.
bye.

so tired.

2012-01-04T16:02:00.002+08:00

okay so the expired cough syrup didnt kill me afterall.
dayummn.

feeling real sick.
and sis just fed me chips.
so evil.

so yah.
i took out the bottle of cough syrup in the fridge.
very sure no one touched it for at least 5 years.
around 10ml left, and that was the proper dossage.
so oh well. i poured it out, saw that it was lumpy,
stared at it, told my mom.
she was like , NO LAH you talk nonsense.
k fine i drank it.
eh seriously.
one of the worst experiences in my life.
like bits of stuff inside.
and bladdy hewww i swallowed.
how stupid.
and yeah expiry in june 2011.
not so bad i guess.
at least it still feels like 2011 to me.
so i guess my body prolly accepted it too.
so sweet.

stay home today cos it's wednesday.
like wednesdayyyyyyy ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
yeah i dont have lessons as usual.
which is good.
hope im well tmr.
dont wna spread the germs to sammy,
and then spread it back to myself again.
thats dumb.

gna sort of start thinking about the port ops presentation now.
like abit scared. cos im doing the intro.
on chhhhhhhhhhiinnaaahh.
no choice.
k nth to be afraid of. i think.
holy moly im so scared ):

k lah bye.
feeling so lethargic now.

i slept at 1130 last night,
woke up at 9am today.
pretty wierd.
cos i was like OMG im so awake k.
and then i took the NEW cough syrup.
and knocked out at 10am.
and woke up at 1.
but feel like sleeping again leh.
btw, i read the syrup label.
side effects are insomnia?
you kidding me?

k bye

2012-01-03T20:44:00.002+08:00

blood brothers.

warning : VERY naggy post ahead.

just wna get this off my chest once and for all.
then i'll forget it.
afterall, my blog. (duh)

stupid events, resentment, nose excrement(water form)
feeling really sick now.
is it the weather or isit just me damn it.

and im really physically and mentally exhausted.
dont HAH me.
i know it's the first day of school.
but my bio clock's real screwed.
somehow i couldnt sleep at all last night.
i mean besides the fact that han told me she banged her head on the fridge and cried.
not sure if it was her birthday
but i had a good laugh. a best laugh actually.
so typical of her.

and yeah today i had lessons at 8am.
and got back 3 MST results today.
not quite what i expected i guess.
in a bad way.
wanted to do way better.
but what can i expect.
little progress at a time k chua xi yu.
yeah and by the time im year 3 my cummulative will be like 3.0 with progress.
and i'll be kicked elsewhere.
was really really tired just now seriously.
when i got home i was so tired i cried.
bladdy stupid.
ok i didnt cry cos im tired stupid.
nvrm.

some issues going on.
so what? just have to live with it.
just because you give in and not gain enough respect from certain people,
especially your loved ones, doesnt mean i should just flare right?
it's not like they care actually.
i mean although its my bf or smth,
doesnt make him any better .
and well, while throwing a stupid fit and myself,
i came out with my new year's resolution.
forgive and forget.
so proud of me right?
bet y'all like , ... ._. duh.
yeah. and i wished everyone in the world , which includes me,
will just forget about the resentment and just appreciate every single mini thing we have.
i like that.
OMG I HAVE A NEW ERASER MY LIFE IS COMPLETE.
k not so mini.
k ya maybe that .

yeah. cant believe i actually had those bad thoughts.
so disappointed in myself.
classmates were talking about new year stuff today.
about how much money their parents gave them to buy clothes and what not.
i honestly honestly went blank.
cos umm i never had money from my parents just to buy clothes.
for new year or anything.
well, at least my mom made sure i didnt have any thoughts.
she'll be like, )(*)(*)(*@#@%#$!@ you have so many clothes and blah blahhh.
those were my sister's bras mom.
no kidding.
yeah and i felt a lil angry and of course jealous, doh.
like so unfair people get to spend hundreds without having to feel the pain of where that amount came from.
it's not that they're rich or anything.
i dont know.
but it felt the norm.
and i felt so stupid.
had the urge to just barge in to my mom's room and reach my hands out.
so bad right.
yeah guess i managed to slap myself damn hard to reality.
literally.
i dont need those stuff to be honest. its all material.
it's not like im in a bad condition any huh?
i got the freaking nerve to blog with my own laptop.
and if i said i dont have anything,
i promise any random person reading this can just slap me and call me bastard.
not so hard hor.
i just want my dad back here

so, blood brothers.
get it?

ok done.

SHOOT ME PLEASE
IM SO TIRED
i nearly fell asleep eating my potatoes for dinner

ok bye

thank god for the no lesson day tmr

bye

2012-01-02T20:42:00.006+08:00

It's 2nd january ! (AGAIN)
some unknown person's birthday.
cant rmb.
oh .. ohh...

happy birthday han !
it's okay, she'll read this on wednesday.
if she ever reads this.
i know im so sweet and everything.
dont even know if she'll ever read this,
cos perhaps she doesnt know it's her birthday yet today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
this is us, eating dinosaur rocks on the last day of school.
so memorable right.
with the 4e2 logo on my head and some stupid heart on yours.
doesnt make sense.
think this is the best photo of you so far.
you look so.... pretty.
you look like the dinosaur mama eating her own eggs.
and i most definately look like myself. (duh)

this is us at coffee bean where you attempt to go on diet
and end up sharing my sandwhich.
so nice.
i love my hair omg.
cos i cut my fringe myself.
(notice how you're always the one holding the cam)

this is us at HAN's cafe, after o lvls.
stoning and eating ur kaya toast.
because we only had a budget of $5.60
(total combined amount left in our pockets)

this is us, during speech last year . with huijuann.
and your girl BRIGADE uniform.
too bad u werent wearing ur cancer hat.
it'd be nicer.
our last day of cca.

okay this is sec3.
the i-thought-you-were-damn-nice period.
i'd like force you to sit beside me during amath period
cos i think i fell in love with u.
umm.
and we'd like crap and everything.
and every time i'd like wish for you to reveal ur diary bit by bit.
which was kinda funny.
yeah that was all the fun before everything happened once upon a time.

this was actually the day i found out you were true blonde. and bimbotic.
we took this pic with my phone camera.
which was real cool for me last time.
cos phones werent allowed and all.
im so cool.
okay the part was, it was taken at a different angle.
and you were like, OMG WHY THE MOUSE EXPAND UNTIL SO BIG.
IT LOOKS LIKE A REAL MOUSE
umm. yeah.

eh. wierd button nose i had there.

thank goodness for the plastic.

no k kidding.

guess what?

i think i lost the ECP ''4e2 outing''

the day we went ECP ourselves.

just the two of us.

and you told others about the 4e2 outing.

woman living in self-denial. but oh well.

that's han.

i lost the photos omg ! ):

kkkkkk love you han.

bye.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

huh. school's starting tmr.

8am.

the worst part, IT on tues as usual for 4hours.

i hate my life seriously.

k bye

2012-01-01T22:54:00.002+08:00

okay yeah.
new year ! boring day.
spent my entire day cleaning up my room.
now its neat.
and sis say she can hear the echo.
coolio.

okay i havent quite updated any new year resolutions right?
i havent been actually thinking to be honest.
such a bum.
k gna start thinking now.
think think think. nope. nth.

anw, stuffys replied the mail.
like so happy, and of course contented.
hopefully this would be a better year after the screw up year i had a day before.
i mean yeah, who doesnt say that every year.
so imma say it too.

school's starting in like 1 day.
i feel like crying seriously.
omgomgomgg.
no really. i feel like crying , literally.
can just rip my hair off.
no cannot, i just did frizzy hair treatment

k. tmr im gna stone in bed for 5 hours.
must make the time worth horr?

ok bye

2012-01-01T00:55:00.002+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR PEEPS.

it's 2012 and i just had my bath.
i feel so good.
but my room's still messy, bed sheets unchanged,
toys and pillow smelly, bags and shoes not washed.
yep that's about .
so practically, it's 2012.
nth to be surprised about except for the fact that i smell nice.
( currently )

and so yesterday i woke up pretty early.
for my bioclock , yes.
like 10am ?
holy moly 10am .
so early k.
you guys can just watch me die or self-destruct when school reopens.
went to school to meet danielle and yiuwah for econs project.
bladdy hewwwwww?
was wondering for weeks why they werent panicking or whatsoever with the deadline.
i didnt see the deadline as 20th jan.
ttttttttoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooot.
hahhaa
okay and then i was really tired and stoned throughout
and went home to stone.
wanted to nap but no time.
and i bathed and met da.
at like 4pm.
asshole, he's always late.
sis say i should just walk away if a guy is late.
why didnt i think of that throughout the 2years and 4months.
i ought to.
she's like bladdy ruthless and heartless and whatever she can be to guys.
but i ought to learn
okay so we went like 313 again.
omg. i just went there 2 days ago
and yeah went to ''shop''
so boring to shop with that guy.
we went h&m . like nth.
for him. idiot guy.

wanted to go to GJ with rosalind to find JH and rum.
really miss them alot, really.
but i jeez, i was so freaking tired i could sleep standing.
and da dragged me to some stupid movie.
MARGIN CALL.
the stupidest movie. ever.
over its the 2nd stupidest.
the stupidest was when i watched with dq and huivoon in sec2
some show called dan's life or smth.
practically showing the life of that guy.
which is ...
and plus the awkwardness.
ok yes, i nearly fell asleep yesterday.
stupid movie.
waste my time.
i feel like kicking da.
ok no kidding.
ok maybe abit.
damn it i wanted to watch new year's eve.
so so so sad.

today i met up with him again.
cos he's abit sick and he acts like a girl and acts like he's dying.
he has flu.
and i get it too now.
damn it .

okay and just now i went with sis to eat icecream.
and a lil bit of fries .
and IM SO TIRED damn it.
someone save me.
feel like knocking out alr.
but gna force myself to send one last email to him.
before i give up.

okay so happy new year.
bye.

2011-12-29T00:54:00.003+08:00

HOLY MOLLY.

went out with my pokes today!!!
after 098120398038131 years eh.
we had so much fun omg.
ok we took the long long bus ride in the afternoon.
talked a lil.
miss pokes so much.
she said i changed anw.
i nvr lor.

okay yeah.
so we went to eat burger.
so naise. its damn cool.
gna bring da to eat there next time.
but he doesnt like burgers.
sissy.
he only eat chinese food -.-
ok and mac wings

so yeah pokes and i went shoppinggg~
shop for her stuff actually.

she bought a freaking fossil watch oh lawd.

and h&m shoes.

damn it.

i came home empty handed

i got my hair treated anw.

its fine now. i think

okay so i went to collect the headphones and went home.

phewwwish.

so tired damn it.

my legs ache. and pokes says im useless.

so mean.

okay jeez.

got band tmr or smth.

maybe project?

i have no clue .

ok. like sleepy and everything.

kinda miss dad.

home like empty abit.

and im not meeting da for new years eve.

wts. feel like crying and pulling my hair out.

whatever

Dog Loves Listening to Guitar

2011-12-28T00:07:00.001+08:00

OMG SO CUTE RIGHT?!?
so flufffehhh.
i watched it like15 times alr.
omg. so cute. so cute i can cry.

okay anw.
WILL. NOT. TALK . TO . MYSELF.
MUSTTTTT RESIST.
right hongyong?

okay i had band today.
had photo-taking at 345.
and there was this close up thingy?
haha like so awkward.
what if i closed my eyes.
or my hair's messy.
or frizzy.
or covers my eyes.
or my head looks big.
or...
nvrm.
ok so minghui , shuxian and i went to eat mac.
2nd time eating mac this year !
i ate fillet-o-fish for the first time in my life.
(shuxian and minghui stares)
pretty cool huh.
okay its like squishy and everything i swear.
as in the bread part?
seriouslyyyy.
like unlike the sesame seeded burger.
LOL seeded.
okay yeah. its squishy and soft.
i was so amazed and then i kept pressing the bread.
leaving some depression on the burger.
looked so cute.
and yeah. they both stared at me again.
i dont know why man.
ok so i was really full cos i had nuggets as well.
and i think i had indigestion.
like buffet after effects feeling on the tummy.

and we had sectionals and stuff.
for awhile.
i like to play in the open.
feel so open sounded.
sounded, LOL.

oh and feel so depressed.
oli's not buying my trumpet anymore.
and the consequences are freaking big
and my hopes are so crashed i can die
omg...
feel like just begging her.
and plus the financial crisis im in now.
now crisis as in i spent my month's allowance.
crisis as in sorta permanent.
if you get what i mean.
uhhh..

okay, body clock's abit screwed.

bye.

2011-12-25T22:02:00.002+08:00

christmas , christmasss.

yay now michael buble.
michael bubble. hahaha.
k his voice so naise.

okayyy.
so rosalind came to my house.
and we crapped, alot.
watched teeevee.
and watched movies.
yst night we watched 127 hours, basically screaming,
and then woke my sis up.
and we watched how the grinch stole christmas.
so scary.
ZOOOMG worse than horror show i tell yer.
okay and we partehh.
we took pictures.
chill out.
snacked. haha.
had the whole box of merci chocolates.
WHOLE box.
and chips and baby bites. haha.
and we ate noodles?
i dont eat at night.
midnight.
so umm. i had tummy upset.
whoops. and then at like 2 plus we felt so sleepy alr -.-
haha. the ''yeahhh gna party all night longg !''
and the '' MOVIE MARATHON''
failed. ikr.
oh yeah. and then midnight we exchanged presents.
who cares about boxing day man.
okay everyone else. so we ripped out wrappers.
anddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd.
i gave her a jersey.
and she gave me...... the same thing.
OMG RIGHT.
breast friends forever.
this is real friendshit .

okay and we woke up this morning.
to catch my elder sis nibbling on the merci.
uhhhh. hahaha.
and we went swimming. and played with the underwater cam for 10 mins?
and the cam died ._.
wthhh. and we went sauna.
i swear we nearly became roast.
the room was heated till 80 deg .
and yeah she couldnt take it. hahaahhaaa.
so funneeehh.

okay so we bathed and went back up to watch
30 mins or less, and social network.
so sleepy seriously.

k gna slp early.
like after this michael buble thingy.
he's kinda cute. haha

okay i am so dead.
did i mentioned this alr?
i havent done econs.
like . not even read what the hell the article's about.
think danielle's gna slaughter me and yiuwah really.
ok . gna try tmr.

k bye.
merry christmas smelly peeps.

2011-12-24T01:32:00.002+08:00

it's christmas eve alr.

time really flies.
rmb a year ago somebody appeared at my house
with so many teddies.
umm nope, not santa.

okay wierd day today.
sis made me mini her.
and she put eye liner on me.
i literally screamed big time when i saw myself in the mirror.
but yeah, i got used to it
dont really like it though.
its like.. if you use it for long, you'll have to use it like forever
cos without it ppl will say u look dead.
hmm.

and then i went to meet da.
went to plaza sing.
the headphones workk!!
so crap, now i have 2 headphones.
haha.
monday wed fri.
tues thurs sat.
sunday off.
okay set.

okay so we went there.
looked around for awhile.
cannot find rosalind's christmas present ):
she want jersey.
so ex.
i broke.
then we went to da's place for awhile to take stuff.
and went to ikea to eat .
first time going with him.
he suaku. really.
he's like. ehhh. why everyone got trolleys wan.
and , HUHH. why ppl got tray wan?!
and , where's my potato salad?!?
yeah. he only ate potato salad the last time he came to ikea.
that woman has no life really.
he only know chinese food.
he never tasted meatballs in his entire life.
and i forced him and he said it was going to be disgusting.
so when he really tried it he just smiled and stare at me.
idiot guy. but so cute. <-- adorable but ugly f.y.i
ok and we had the DAIM cake.
awesome-ness. same thing. he didnt believe me.
and like revenge? he made me try the salmon.
damn gross. so fishy. duh. salmon. fish. fishy.
k. and we headed home.

hold on. YOUTUBE ADVS ARE SERIOUSLY PISSING ME OFF.
()*#(@*#)@#

okayy.

sooooo.
so eggxictiritieited.
rosalind 's coming over tmr ! night.
and stay overrrrr.
yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
so happeeeh.
had to act to solemn infront of da just now.
cos he jealous boi.
that i dont follow him to KL and stay in spore to have fun.
so he said, ok fine.. have fun. but not too much fun ):
hahaha!

lastly, stuffys.
if you're reading this, somehow ,
wherever you are,
please check your ichat alright?

and ,
merry christmas in advance everyone ! (:

2011-12-22T15:46:00.002+08:00

i am dead.

haha yeah.
havent done much of projects.
deadline : 3rd jan?
holy crap seriously.
im really enjoying the hols.
like rotting at home everyday.
not brushing my teeth till 3pm.
k . haha. irrelevant.
argh.
gta start doingggg.
5 mins.

okay going for band later.
i dont know about the concert tickets man.
since it's going to be my last..
haish. oh well.

okay bye.

2011-12-20T16:23:00.001+08:00

K NOT GOING BAND.

WOOHOO.

checked out the rehearsal schedule.

dont have the songs im playing.

so..

OKAYYYYY!

2011-12-20T15:24:00.002+08:00

ok.
why not last epi?!?!?!?!!
its like never going to end.

okay, dad's left for india already.
just.
he's going to be away for a month.
so he's going to give MD a miss.
not like he wont sleep.
but yeah, im gna miss him.
so awkward.
he's like, dont fight with your sisters ah.
and im like okay.
since when do i fight with them.
that reminds me.
sis took the hairband i just bought.
im going to freaking beat her up later.

okayyy yayy.
rosalind's coming over on saturday.
and then she's staying overnight.
and we're not going to sleep.
(i think)
and we're going swim.
im finally going to swim.
after like a year.
okay. rmb i used to swim like everyday .
and i was damn black.
i mean tanned.
and woo.
cos swimming damages my hair and makes girls flat,
i stopped.
once in a while.
heh heh.
she has underwater cammmmmmmmm.
feel like wearing pyjamas and cannon ball in the water.
so cool.
and it's christmasssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss.
no diff.

k . i really want to meet my pokes.
havent met her in a year !
well nearly...
its been so long ):

ok band ltr.
going to go school a lil early to stone with minghui.
like stone.
STONE.
literally.
woohoo. my fav past time.

k bye.

2011-12-19T23:19:00.002+08:00

feeling so lethargic. ):
i slept 8 hours tho.

haha when its was like 8pm my eyes were damn small.
my mom laughed at me for like 3 mins and i stared at her.
whuds so funneh?
im really tired.
pretty okay after a bathe tho.
dont feel so well.
prolly the fried chicken , fried everything is taking a toll,
on my throat.
and my forehead feels like its burning or smth.
but my mom say, '' nth lahhh. just because u have band tmr again.
dont think i know you wan me write letter for ur band teacher right.''
OMG MOM.
im in poly.
like P O L Y.
i dont think i did that in bukit view did i ?
hahaha.
umm.
i forgot.

okay.
rosalind's gna come over for christmas.
please please pleaseeee.
she has an underwater cam.
so.. hehhehheh.
not the bathtub pls, the pool.
k. hope she can stayyyy.

basically doing a very good job maintaining my job scope.
staying at homeee.
i watched tv for 6 hours straight today.
that's like a whole shift.
hahahaa cheyy.
anw tmr tayong dalawa last epi.
wadddddddddddd.
been missing out everything ever since school started.
and i finally get to catch one epi, and it's the last.
k better than nth.
y'know da watches it too?
gay boi.
he stay home for the past 00912012091239012 days.
and he watches it everyday.
this world needs some justice.

ok.
gna slp early today.
cos im tired.
):

early like.. 1 more hour?
(:

okay.

2011-12-18T22:38:00.002+08:00

omg.

i wanna go to the titanic artscience museummmmmm.
kkkk next year.
i start saving 50 cents a day.
0.-

haha.
went to meet rosalind today! ^^
finally, after like 2 months.
omg. so long.
she had ut and then i had exams and then she had somemore ut.
so wait wait wait.
.___. missed her so much.
we went to clementi to get stuff, eat go ntuc get junk,
and went to lepak place.
we really need to have a new lepak place.
it was raining and i nearly died seriously.
cos it rained, there were mosquitoes.
and i had 16 mosquito bites. i swear.
she had like 2.
-.- wai me.
imagine if those were aedes bites.
i would have died on the way home.
haha no actually i dont know.

okay so im meeting her for christmas !
the kind of emo christmas.
but i hope she stays over.
i cant go to da's, cos they're going to KL.
and my mom doesnt allow.
im going there in march anw .
so oh well..
rosalind here i comeee.
and y'know what?!
WHAT.
k i found the scrabble ring.
yayyyyyyyyyyyy.
didnt dare to tell her i lost it.
haha shhhh.
but i found it , so phew.

jeez, really wanted to spend time with sean han they all for christmas.
all da's fault.
):

okay gna go to sch tmr , for port ops proj.
again.
/: so sick of going back to school during the holidays.
urgh.

k bye.

2011-12-17T22:40:00.002+08:00

yes, speechless.

kinda tired of these issues going on.

on the brighter side,
my second sis bought me a pair of audiotechnica earphones at courts after dinner.
dad wanted to buy his harddrive.
and i saw these earphones.
like so nice.
been dying to have one of my own.
okay the skull candy spoilt. fine.
and yeah. the sennheiser one.
and the 3 ipod apple earpieces.
and the orange earpiece da bought me.
and the other one.
and alot more. trust me.
okay dear earphones, even if you want to die,
please die within a year so i can get the warranty.
so yeah, awesome sis!

really feel great to have minghui as my best buddy.
she's like the best ever person in my poly life.
really.
learnt my lesson not to jump right straight into conclusions next time.
i mean that's me. that's xiyu.
im stupid in that way or any other.

alright.

anw the earphones are noise cancellation ones.
i am very sure mom nagged at me just now.
just cant hear.
weeeeeeeeeeeeee.

k bye.

2011-12-14T22:00:00.002+08:00

OKAY.

went to do project with biyu and yiyan.
so productive ! hahaha.
okay we went to plaza sing, i went to send my earphones for repair.
now i feel stupid.
it cost me 37 bucks to repair the skull candy.
a new skull candy is 68bucks -.-
but later gayboi nag nag nag.
say everything he buy me also spoil.
im so mean.
and didnt mean to be mean.
okay. so. yah.

we went to do proj at orchard central.
went to spinelli.
wasted my money on ice chocolate.
it's freaking dense and everything.
not worth my 6 bucks.
i want gloria jean's ice chocolate ):
with 6 oreo cookies >:]
ya really. i used to put 6 in them.
like awesome. honestly.
fat and everything.
but worth the fat yozz.

yeah and we went to sticky shop to buy sweets.
so wanted to get some.
but over budget and stuff.
there was this i love you candy.
so naisseeee.
wanted to get for da.
firstly he's busy in his own world .
and secondly i shouldnt be the one buying this kind of stuff.
and yeah no money.
so too bad..
i told him. and he was like
WHHHHHHHHUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT.

got band day camp tmr holy crap.
is my bodyclock still screwed up or wad?
i had 9 hours of sleep and i felt so sleepy since 6pm.
like auto 6pm my eyelids started feeling heavy.
yiyan so niceee. she gave me sticky.
so awesome.
when im rich someday.
SOMEDAY. i will give her a jar or it.
not like i aspire to be rich or anything.
nahhhh.

okayyy so band tmr.
so tiredd, really ):

2011-12-13T19:41:00.002+08:00

official first day of hols?
awesome-ness.
sorta.

like no exams.
i can watch TEEVEE and not panic during dinner time.
k yah thats all.

went back to school to do projs.
with danielle and yiuwah.
well at least we found an article.
and i gotta start working my brains alr.
i think i switched it off after port ops.

been really troubled these few days.
finally made the right decision , to put everything down.
well, i mean , they say if you love someone,
giving in when you're right or wrong doesnt matter anymore.
i finally understood that.
like finally.
it's like im finally going through puberty or smth.
lol k no.
i just hope you wouldnt just step over me after i apologise.
doesnt mean im weak that i apologise.
or a matter or who wins or who is right.
i just want you to be happy.
and hopefully, nothing else matters.

for now, stupid projects.
feel like they're never gonna be completed.
and plus band day camp on thurs fri and sat.
10am-10pm.
dont think i will call it day camp.

alright, gta go.
i feel so disorganised and messy now.

everything in my life's so urgh.

2011-12-12T22:20:00.001+08:00

bitch life.
bitch bitch life.

i wish i could just get over it honestly.
this has nothing to do with me.
why do i feel like this?

isit my fault perhaps?
if it is, then i absolutely deserve this.

2011-12-12T17:52:00.000+08:00

bladdy frustrating.

dont think about it.
just dont think about it.

im supposed to be happy.

2011-12-12T12:38:00.001+08:00

OMG I REALISED I NEVER DO SOME OF THE QUIZZZZZES.

NOOOOOOOOO.
I HATE MY LIFE.
SCREW IT.
THATS LIKE ALOT.
I ONLY DID CHAP1 FOR BUNKERING.
AND CHAP5 I DIDNT DO FOR ECONS.
I AM DEAD.
WTH WAS I THINKING?
K WONT EVEN BOTHER TURNING OF THE CAPS LOCK.
IM SO FRUSTRATED.
BLAME MYSELF I GUESS.
IM . SO. ANGRY .
SO ANGRY I CAN EAT ROCKS.
AND POOP BRICKS.

JEEEZ.
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAI

2011-12-11T23:53:00.002+08:00

okay. me . back again.

feel pretty bad to have to actually tell a lie to my parents.
it's not even a white lie.
the sacrifices i take sometimes..
jeez.

feeling extremely exhausted now.
i didnt sleep last night.
the feeling really sucks.
it's like self-tormentaion and reproach or something.
rather difficult to pen it down.
at least now i know how adults feel,
the frustration.. the pain..
something like that.

honestly dont know what to expect from others.
and of course, dont actually know what to expect from myself.
my own goals, the achievements that maximises my drive for everything,
studies , and so on.
sometime i really feel like im wasting just that little space on Earth.
just because i dont have anything to live for.
at least well.. that's when i feel .

okay then.

bye.

2011-12-10T16:24:00.001+08:00

''Life gives us many different chapters. One bad chapter doesnt mean it's the end of the book.''

2011-12-10T12:26:00.002+08:00

WOOOOOOOOO PHEWWWWWWWWWWW.

feel so friggin relieved.
eh, somehow think that someone's gna get 100 marks for port ops.
not me, duh.

okay anw,
now im like at da's house in msia to stay till sunday.
pretty wierd.
and he's like screwing my bio clock seriously.
i have dinner at 6pm at home.
he has his dinner at 10pm.
and sleeps at 3 am.
i wake up at 6am on school days.
and he wakes up at 2pm?
seriously?
all this screwing up is giving me gastritis.
big time.

k im like sitting in the corner of the room and stonning lika boss.
ok. at least i dont have to worry about procrastination for the next few days.
everything's so laid back now.
can i drop dead already?

oh btw, 5 projects this term.
/:

bye

2011-12-08T13:54:00.003+08:00

I CAN ALREADY FEEL MY HAIR TURNING WHITE.

screw it.
2 more papers and i'll be free for the next.
few day?
life sucks, i know.
im like so jumpy.
so intolerant. and restless.
im like OKAY STUDY.
and then after 5 secs i'll open a new youtube tab.
sum ting wong.

study . study.
hey my fav tv programme!

k byee.

2011-12-07T17:58:00.002+08:00

YAAAAAAAAAY IM GOING TO KL!

that will be march 3rd.
haha the day my hols start.
so awesome.
going with sis alone.
can go zouk hehhehheh.
cos i'll be 18 next ZOMGGG.
k kidding about going zouk.
I WANT KRISPY CREME (Y)(Y)(Y)
that time went to korea and i ate it.
like awesomezzzzzzzzz.

oh yeah,
cos jetstar had one for one.
sis is crazy.
she's going hongkong with her friend as well.
-.-
okayyy.

bye.

so excited.

ahhh bye.

2011-12-07T14:18:00.002+08:00

OMG. what happened to macaulay culkin?!
y'know that home alone guy.
he's like 31 this year.
omg. and he's umm .. not very cute anymore.
or at all.
i just wasted my time.
like 2 hours. watching ellen vids.
real funny and addictive.
not considered wasting time.
but it's the exam period so yeah...

left with 2 papers.
and i have no drive already.
finish already my drive.
yst felt like friday.
like no more papers left.
think because of the lab exams that made me feel this way.
feel mentally drained and everything.
no mood ah.

and friday im going over to da's .
his msia house.
he said he's gna drive me.
i feel damn scared alr can, after his car crashed cos he was sleeping thing.
and the beetle like died or smth.
no lah, its being sent for repair .
so maybe he has to drive another bigger car.
which is quite sad.
but he said he'll fetch me to school on fri.
aww,so sweet.

i've got a paper from 8-930am.
and the second at 3-430pm.
so he'll wait till my paper ends, and then we'll go off.
partehh.
k really ah.
i dont feel like studying anymore.
feel so sad when i look at port ops.
like stupid eh.
so much to study for chap6 and i dont know whats going on.

okay thennnnnnnnn.
bye.

2011-12-06T18:15:00.002+08:00

yawn..
feeling so sleepy.
im like in the library with minghui now.

done with a chapter of 23 slide.
like nothing to write on.
its all pictures.odd.
and my jaw's kinda tired from nibbling on nips.
kinda wrong.
i meant NIPS, cheapo chocolate.
makes me feel happy cos its cheaper than M&Ms.
but dissatisfied.
but still..
my jaw hurts halfway all the time.
nvrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
k like first time this term staying in school to study.

2 papers down, and 2 more to go ^^
like lost the drive for studying alr.
totally.
CHRISTMAS YAWWWWWWWWWWWW.
jingle bells, xiyu smells, joanne laid an egg.
hahahhahaa. rmb we used to sing that last time.
cos in february , REALLLY FEB, pokes will tell me she cant wait for christmas.
idiot pokes. miss her so much ):

and i miss my teddy. ):
love sick much. idiot da .

okay. concentrate woman, concentrate.
k bye.

2011-12-05T18:39:00.002+08:00

woo ! 1 paper done.
189 to go.
k kidding.
3 to go. phew.
(: feel so relieved somehow.
but , i lost 10 marks): jeez.
the supply in shipping thing i dont know how to do.
):

k nvrm. not thinking about it alr.
bunkering tmr.
cheam and everything.
a lil scared.
but i think im just gna study the tutorials like everyone else?
i guess so ah.
hope i do well.
oh and i havent chosen my gened thingy eh.
i dont even know wth it's for.
gened is crap.

and i think my bioclock gna be screwed this week?
i slept at like 3 last night.
idiot da. all his fault.
he called at like 11plus at night.
and then we quarrelled. stupid grumpy boi. gay boi.
and then we put down the phone at 1 plus.
and then i was scared for econs, then i knocked out
and i woke up at 10 am to study.
and go to school at 215pm.
k im telling every exact bit.

i kinda feel sleepy nao ):

kkkk. tonight sleep early.
pOOOORmise.

byebye.

2011-12-04T11:36:00.007+08:00

PICTURES YAW.
sorry for stealing oli.
i love you <3

woo. the scary gang, black peeps.
k im the only one that looks like im acting gangsta.
so act. sheesh.
i was not prepared k.
k at least look at jaron. hehheh.
i think i noe why.
look at the idiot guy behind me grabbing my head.
pedo.

near perfect.
but jaron still... yeah.

HUIMEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII ! <3
awesome nice person.

k LOOK AT HANNAN.

i feel so disappointed in myself.

wahlao eh.

we were like... our height was prolly at my nose level now.

and now he's like..

and i swear i attempted to tip-toe.
and his feet is humongus.
it used to be size 6.

now it's like 10.

crap.

i feel like crying.

k my mini look alike.

so cute right.

oli says she's wierd, like me.

and our posture's the same.

which is umm. good?

k im going to teach her my style when i go back.

and make sure she plays solos.

woo! go twin. i mean look alike.

her name is phoebe tho.

not xi something.

oli died her hair.
no diff. nyeh nyeh nyehhhh

oh yah.

i might be selling sammy to oli.

): sigh.. financial problems and other problems.

will really miss that guy ):

gna treasure my times with sammy.

bathe him every 2 weeks.

haha. k bye.

study xiyu.

no, mug xiyu, mug

2011-12-04T11:23:00.002+08:00

honestly?

big boulder off my chest.
cos bv's concert is finally over.
i mean , not like i feel any single one of them panic.
well, i did.
jaron did
da did.
and of course oli did too.
for some simple reason, we had no time for the rehearsals and everything.
esp me. cos i had exams on friday and couldnt make it.
plus, exams are like ... tmr. gawd.
and im not done with revision because of this stupid concert.
but i just wna perform with oli one last time.
and im glad i did!
and i pushed jaron away cos i wanted to sit with oli.
feel so mean.
and i called hannan to buy food for us, and put down the phone with no orders.
im so mean to them both ):
i feel so bad omg. wahlao.
kkkk. concert was fine.
i mean, practically side read all the pieces.
managed it with no MAJOR booboos.
major ah. i said major.
and i guess it was fun, cos i got to play with the peeps .
the old peeps. and i feel so happy !!!
phew. hahas.
really miss everyone man.
and there's this look alike in band .
she's like sec 1.
and they say she looks like me.
i honestly think she's quite cute k.
i mean she. yeah if you get it.
heh. -.-
k i mean realllyyyyyyyyy. and i dont think she looks like me goodness.
but im still the original flavour tho.
original.

now that i feel all relieved and everything,
not thinking about how i screwed stats and IT.
i have 4 more papers to go.
none prepared.
and umm. yayyy like 3 papers from 3pm to 5pm.
sleep lika boss babbbehhhh.
just kiddding. needa wake up early.
k lor.

oh , and da got into a mini accident.
i mean, he's okay.
but the beetle crashed.
just a lil. he fell asleep on the highway while going home.
i feel so.. urghh.
cos it happened the last time when he was driving me back.
and thank goodness i was with him.
not so lucky this time huh.
and it crashed on the left side.
i would have died if i were there with him anw.
feel so speechless..
haish.

bye lor.

2011-12-01T16:25:00.001+08:00

sometimes i really wonder,
what exactly happened?

i wished, we'd skip through this stage.
and remain as friends , forever.
best friends.
walking past you like i dont care.
it's not like im inhumane or something.
wonder if you'll still think about me sometimes.

nope, not talking about my boyfriend.

2011-12-01T15:59:00.003+08:00

thousand years by christina perri so emozzzz.

it's my 801th post.
and it's december.
so fast aye?
time reallyy really really flies.
i swear.
i mean, the last time i remember, O levels just ended.
and everyone in the entire world had a job except me.
so depressed right.
time flies.
jeez.
i miss last year tho.
hahaa. miss the freedom and everything.
come to think of it,
today's my last lesson of the year.
and well, i skipped it. HAHA!
im so mean.
:P
k i went for port ops.
i skipped econs, bunkering and eff comm.
like afraid i'd miss out crap.
but still... cant wait to get home seriously.
i love staying at home.
k i sound like some loner freak.

having both exams tmr.
8-9.30, 415-545.
and i'll go home at 930 after stats (O:
( freak )
): kkkkkkk. i hope i do well.
will practice more then.

irritating gayboi.
i nearly fell asleep last night and then he kept spamming me.
ass. really, and then i couldnt slp alr.
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. feeling kinda sleepy.
but 's gna be a lil waste of time uh,
since im not studying on fri and sat.
damn it.
okay then.

ohhh! and da say i grew taller, again.
hehhehhehhh.
yahoo. he said i used to be at his chin level.
asshole.
i hope i'll be his height.
im my dreams lol.

gna stop procrastinating.

bye peeps.

2011-11-30T21:55:00.003+08:00

HOLY CRAP! MY 800th post ! :D

just happened to see 799.
so cute.
k.
wierd day today.
i mean i was so pissed at first.
and then now im okay.

k woke up to pack house and study.
and then got distracted and watched AFV.
so cute.
and then like sis was at home.
so just studied till like 2 plus 3.
and my came home.
and da came over to my house.
i cooked for him and accidentally added too much ham in his pasta
and my pasta like nothing. so sad right
nvrm i ended up stealing his. just a teensy bit.
and then my mom made him ribena and then ribena finished.
so unfair.
ya k. so i studied abit more.
and he gamed.
he showed me his awesome laptop.
not.
eesh. so big and heavy.
he put it in the bag.
and y'know what? it's as heavy as sammy i swear.
damn heavy uh.
stupid gaming laptop.
he and his awesome graphics and blah da blah da.
okay and then halfway he realised he had assignments.
hehhehhehh so much for slacking.
i think he skipped it.
okay, and anw.
my mom cooked dinner.
and she asked me to take a lil bit for him.
so i did.
he ended up eating 2 bowls.
ass.

and then i sent him down to the car.
and when i came out my dinner was gone.
cos my mom thought i ate alr.
very naise.
im so sad.

okay , so much so studying.
i feel like i havent got enough time.
dad's having bbq on friday night.
and da's coming over.
and han ( YAY) , jx and tw i think.
so i wont be studying
and da's staying over, cos we've got bv's concert on sat.
so not prepared /: i hope i'll side read fine.
HOLY crap.
and we're wearing like.. jeans.
then okay lorss.

ya k.
friday got IT and stats exam.
scareddddd.
and stats like 8-10am , IT 415-545. jeez
i'll try to rush back to bv inbetween.
but i scared i rush, then i forgot all the sums and formulas.
well, thats me.
wad ta dooo.
):
i tryyy.

k bye.

Vintage Lady Gaga Live at NYU - Captivated & Electric Kiss

2011-11-27T13:01:00.000+08:00

omg the old lady gaga (':

2011-11-27T10:48:00.002+08:00

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ.

so tired . T-T
woke up at 845am.
cos dad bought breakfast.
and he like make alooooot of noise.
and my mom like shout from the other end of the house to him.
'' no lahh, she wont wake up so early wan!!!''
and i woke up. thanks mom.

k. feel real tired cos i slept late last night.
last night da went out with sean and the others.
he had to drive home, and stopped by my house.
so sweet. he bought rockmelon milk.
like eww. but okay lah.
and i got him vanilla oreo.
personally think it sucks.
but he likes it. bad taste. ikr.
grumbly naggy guy.
just because sean scratched him a wee bit,
he kept complaining about how it hurts.
gay boi.

I FEEL SO SLEEPY.
need to mug.
oh , and going to grandpa's house later for dinner.
its his birthday.
their birthdays are pretty confusing.
they sorta go according to the chinese calendar.
so last year it was decemeber.
now its november. and it changes every year.
wonder who's the ass that created the chinese calendar according to the moon.
jeez.
k no answers.
i feel so confused anw.
cos i cant really communicate with my grandparents on my mom's side.
i dont even know if i should say happy birthday or not.
im so confused. and sleepy.

just figured out gened presentation's tmr.
holy. im freaking out.
and yawning.

k bye.

2011-11-26T14:41:00.002+08:00

VIOLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
finally completed le gened proj.
like loner project.
do ALONE.
present ALONE.
so sad right?
ikr.
and im going to die alone.
hope stage fright gets better?
(:

okay i woke up quite early around 10am today.
hahaha.
k. stomach still not feeling so well.
not going to risk puking in the band room.
or in my trumpet sammy.
EWW! the thought of it makes me wna puke.
ironic much?
kkkkkk. anw. i had a nightmare.
i dont know whats wrong with me these days.
its the same cycle.
i cant seem to sleep till after 2 hours on the bed.
and then i'll have a freaking scary nightmare.
and i'll suddenly wake up.
and then i'll rmb the nightmare for the rest of the day.
like 5 days already?

yesterday night, my cat died.
in the dream.
i dont have a cat! like so real. and scary.
i can cry.
i love pets.
but i dont think im going to keep one.
cant bear them leaving me after like 10 years.
i should just keep a turtle.
can like be at my deathbed and stuff.
and can highfive him everyday.
FLIPPPPERRS~ k thats the only thing he will do.
eesh.

ahhhhh k so scary.
im like traumatised.
badly.
lol. talked to sean on twitter this afternoon.
finally we get to talk.
okay we're all going to meet on christmas and new year's day.
im going to book han for new year I DONT CARE.
dont care if it makes her lil cousin cry or smth.
im stealing her.
on the second thought, her birthday will be the day after.
awwmannnn!! so thickskin eh she. i know.
hahaha.

k gened on monday.
like freaking out already.
and its stupid.
presentation at 830, 1030am lesson cancelled.
so the 4 of us got nth to do from 9-1230.
wth? maybe i should go home.
hhaha crazy. but maybe :P

k bye

2011-11-25T23:48:00.002+08:00

k im going to bed soon.

wild day today.
okay i officially know the roads of spore now.
so proud of myself.
errhmm.

so.. da came at like 2 plus?
like 1.5 hours late. asshole.
and we went to expo.
we went to eat.
and i wasnt feeling well.
sumtingwong.
yeah and i puked like twice.

and like there was jam.
like big big jam outside expo and he was bored.
like started pillowfight again in the car.
and then we were really bored.
it took us like 1 hour just to get into the parking area.
and we started shouting for fun.
idk, typical him.
but i joined in, surprisingly.
cos no one could hear us.
then keep shouting WHATTTT!!!!
best way of venting frustration.
and i lead the way k.
im so awesome.
i showed him the way from bukitbatok to expo.
ok we went the wrong road once. but there was a u-turn so i still rock.

k we walked around to look for his dumb laptop for like forever.
seriously.
walk to alienware, then asus then vomit then asus , then asus again then alienware.
alienware's design of laptops seriously damn nice.
i loike. like seriously. look damn cool.
but that naggy biatch like, should i???????? or should i not???????
._. whatever man. get over it.
ended up getting the asus one.
i think its nice.
some gaming republic thing, like so naisee.
and so many freebeeess.
i felt so jealous honestly.
i dont freaking game, neither does he.
but im jealous he has a new toy.
lol idc im hogging it yaw.
and he was like shouldddddd iiiiiiiiiiiii?????????????????? huhhhhhhhhhh
and the asus person got pissed i think.
and she said, she she upgrade the ram to 12gb for free.
WTH MAN . WTH.
where's the justice and love in this world?!?!

k and he brought the money.
in cash.
hahaha. like cute. but wierd.
he asked me to take the money out.
and im like
'ummm okay, so here's one thousand, two thousand...''
like idiot. but i felt cash rich.
haha bunkering. get it? GET IT???!? nvrm.
yeah. so he got his laptop.
like 15.6 inch and 3.5kg?
hope he has fun ah.
like real fun until he doesnt want to meet me.
asshole.
at least we'll have msn now. FINALLY.
it was like 6pm alr

k and im really not feeling well.

WAIIIIIITTTTTTTTTT that's not it.
we went from expo, PIE, to somewhere somewhere and then reached suntec.
phew. so scary. like go wrong place once.
cos i lead him towards changi airport direction.
hahahaaa. k blur.
and we watch BREAKING DAWN.
BREAKING DAWN YAWWW.
yeah i like that movie.
so what if they sparkle.
harry potter still best, but twilight's great too.
yeah the movie like damn awesome but i was freezing max in the theatre
my teeth kept chattering and da said shhh.
bitch.
and yeah, its kinda gruesome.
but im okay with it.
unlike some gay.
oh lawd.

k and then drove home.
went the wrong way again.
we went towards changi airport. AGAIN.
hahahahaaa.

crazy day, but i had fun.
despite being friggin impatient with my guy that acts more like a gf when making decisions.
its the same everywhere.
like if he needs to go shop for clothes, i swear i'll die.
really.

okay g2g slp now.
really not feeling well.
stomach burns.
i puked everything and now i feel HUNGREYY.
c'mon tummeh, its 12.05am.

sleeeep.

2011-11-25T11:18:00.002+08:00

im homeeee.
so early.
k i swear i'll do some work before heading out.
k promise.
*hooks pinkie*

anw..
went to school for stats
not much work.
and thennnnnn.
yiyan went to book her ticket on sistic for the FTisland thingy.
sheesh. kpop fanatics.
imagine $201.20 gone like that.
thats like my entire life savings.
uhh.
no, i mean it. really.
cos her dad's card couldnt go through.
so she borrowed my visa.
now left $2.33.
naise. i broke my record.
hahahaa!
but yeah. she's so nice anw (:

okay, so im going out with da later.
he's driving to spore later.
and we're going to expo for the ITshow to get his laptop.
and i , will personally dump his 6year laptop.
seriously, 6 years?! thats like older than me.
ikr ~
okay and he's driving there.
i wna drive.
hehheh. umm kidding.
yeah. so we're going there.
to expo.
by car.
without knowing directions.
eh c'mon i have the sporean instinct k.
i know go by PIE.
and yeah..
we'll get there in one piece.

okay then.
bye

2011-11-24T14:06:00.002+08:00

im home (:
like a bosssss.

okay , today only had lessons for port ops.
free period for econs.
haha i sound like sec4.
aww i miss sec4.
yeah whatever.

anw, went back to BVMB yst.
i think it was kinda fun eh.
haha. exchange with mayflower.
and i like, dont know what's going on.
just side reading everything.
and well.. turns out okay.
they're like gna play baby by justin bieber omg.
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.
omo omo!
haha when mayflower played for us and oli like WHOOAA YAYYYYY!
and jaron says its stupid and stuff.
he say justinbieber's gay.
stupid jJaron, he's gayer.
haha back to the old times where we used to bully him, big time.
esp yuai. and me and oli laugh like nobody's business.
really miss the good old times.
well, at least we've got this opportunity to perform together . (:
the last practice is on fri.
AND LIKE CRAP I HAVE IT AND STATS EXAM.
im screwed ):
first time side reading on stage, actually performance.
imagine i screw up and start laughing.
lol. k crap.
OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

k plus, i havent started on gened presentation?
nice much. seriously.
people are like, oh phew, presentation's over.
i havent even had mine prepared.
ahhhhhhhhhh.
and like study?
i dont know where to start.

AND WAIT.

BREAKING DAWN IS OUT BABBEHHH.
gna watch it tmr with da.
gay boi.
eh oh and jJaron gave me and oli a carebear each.
so sweet right?
then gay boi jealous.
he made me promise him not to put the carebear by my bedside.
so mean right?!?!
and yst, he drove back to msia.
he stopped by my house , and i passed teddy to him.
like teddy.
THE BIG FAT ENORMOUS BEAR.
i wanted to put him in the passenger seat with safety belt.
beside the driver. fail max.
so cute right? but he could fit.
i mean he did. but his arms were too fat, it blocked the gear box.
so well.. ended up throwing him at the back.
poor teddy.
and gayboi will return it on fri.
i swear i felt so wierd sleeping without that fat bear.
really. felt so empty. hohho i miss teddy alr ):
we are inseperable , and meant for each other.
yuck not really. just that he hogs my bed.

umm and one last thing,
my right hand's swollen.
like pau. its so hard to write cos it hurts
y'know what danielle told me?
she said i need to bang the swollen part once in a while and it will get better.
hahaha! she's so funneyy
probably experienced enough , after her karate sprains and swells.
okay yah, its swollen, very obvious.
but yeah. dont ask.

sis said use a warm towel.
mom said dip my hand in ice.
ummm.
sounds prettyyy... logical.

I WNA WATCH BREAKING DAWN.
k bye.

2011-11-22T21:14:00.003+08:00

yeah.
i dont believe you?
perhaps i really smth really did happen inbetween my choices.
once again i've been proven, wrong.

i got it nailed right?
i was totally right about you.
heartbreaking freak.
honestly? the what did i do wrong reverse psychology thing no longer works on me.
so what is it? my fault?
my freaking fault that i feel broken.
like, oh yeah. i pissed myself off huh.

i mean, if were you , how'd you react?
c'mon man.
call yourself a guy.
i feel manlier than you.

and for someone whom broke my year record of prolly not using the f-word?
shows that prolly you're really something .

FUCK.

heartbreaker. really.
you dont know nothing bout caring.
you dont know nothing about waiting for someone's call for like forever.
you dont know how it hurts.
and you dont care.

three words k.
lust, not love.

2011-11-21T18:49:00.003+08:00

violence; a sign of pregnancy.

feeling kind of moody today.
now and then that nostalgic feeling just hits me randomly.
kinda sucks to be me.

school was fine.
really fine.
like smooth and everything.
still that moodiness.
but yeah. i was able to absorb today.
a lil late or smth?
had the chance to skip gened today .

been trying to study for the past few days.
not so productive it seems.
i mean its not like i didnt try. and i wouldnt said i tried actually.
too many distractions and thoughts.
nothing is going to affect my MST this time. like for the first time.
but okay, i tried studying.
the information goes in for 5 mins.
and im like, UH HUH UH HUHHHHHHHH
and then it comes out after i get distracted with music or the net.
i feel like a puppy. y'know how they get distracted.
its just that im older, and well, im not a dog -.-

k. im just waiting for this eureka moment or smth to just suddenly appear.
great.
eureka moment please hurry.
im left with exactly 13 days.
screw it.
plus the bvmb performance thingy.
holy crap.

andd...

VOIIIILLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
nah kidding.
no moment yet.

wish i could just tell my parents,
hey im just not cut out for studying.
let me rot my whole life.
hahha. chey no.
i love studying !
._____________________________.

byebye

2011-11-20T12:34:00.002+08:00

yawnnn. im like up so early.

just got the message that band's changed.
to tmr(monday) and saturday.
sounds awesome to me .
okay wait actually no eh.
the monday blues kinda thing.
and like there's school at 8am the next day.
wthhh.
its like a self-own moment.
i was smiling to myself a minute ago.
gna message minghui.
OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG.

lol, k parents are coming back today.
in the evening.
naiseeee.
hope they buy nanonano and my life will be complete.

im like hyper nao.
someboddeeee help mee.
kinda prepared for monday blues alr actually.
since time just gets faster and faster. damn it
oh and btw, i dont have to go gen-ed tmr {:<
yayyy. cos my presentation's the following week and crap, i havent prepared a single crap.
save me yaw.
k im gna start.

bye .

2011-11-19T22:38:00.002+08:00

LOL much?
i just realised biyu posted the melcamp day4 long ago.
and its my first time viewing it today.

doesnt really mean anything anymore.
i guess this picture really describes what's left of me.
rmb they were like OMG WHY YOU SIT ON THE FLOOR.
eeeee so dirty. i think its nice.
didnt regret sitting in the middle of no where to take this.
i'd lie down if there were others who would do the same.
haha

decided not to go for band tmr.
or at least for the next few weeks to concentrate on studies
plus , not helping them to perform for the 3rd dec concert.
im helping bukitview alr anw.
if not i'll be going band on tues wed thurs fri and sun.
doesnt sound like i will have a life.

parents just called just now.
like my dad call me and ask if im alright.
of course im alright.
i took a bath and they called, and they thought i died.
the picture fits perfectly-.-
and like he talk finish, pass the phone to my mom
and she's like take care , have a good night.
it felt sweet.
but they're only gone for a night.
omg. my parents.
hahaha.

sis's dumbass-ness II :
''hello? are you going out later??? i dont have key''
duddddddddddde. it's 1030pm. im not you, i wouldnt be out only now.
and she called to the house phone , again.
sum ting wong.
plus, she says she's at PS gloria jeans.
i miss the scones dearly.
but rmb the last time me and rosa ate it, it kinda sucks.

my stomach's grumbling.

shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

2011-11-19T17:18:00.002+08:00

HAHAHA! k i look exceptionally chubbeh.

and da look so skinny. OMG.

k im like laughing to myself.

who cares.

i own the house yaw.

anw my there's this mini slideshow on my homescreen.

and this pic popped out.

rmb me and oli we hiding in the horn cupboard.

yeah that the french horn cupboard.

we threw all the instruments out , and hid in there to emo/use hp.

and da came in and like, wth are you both doing in there?!

hahahaa. stuffff. k eww.

we were friends then anw.

kinda funny.

i miss the damn cupboard.

it must be so smelly now.

and did i mention?

im at home alone.

not really actually.

but technically yes.

dad mom and elder sis went to msia.

and second sis and i stayed home.

but , the moment i woke up , she wasnt home anymore.

bet she's partying like crap.

and i suppose she's taking this opportunity to go clubbing?

so yeah. home alone.

like emo. and laughing to myself.

looking through the sec3 pictures and all.

like when da and i were friends.

and we went to watch movie with xiaohui.

and i cried in a cartoon film. like seriously i did?!?!

k yeah i did. UP was touching k. hmph.

and yeah all the pics with han and jess. and han. eww.

and xiaohui .

oh ! and khoirul nas and xiaohui.

all the hilarious moments and all the crap we did.

buying our first colored contact lenses and freaking out

as though we were getting a tatoo, then buy junk and daiso.

and taking pictures , literally spamming with oli.

and umm jaron? -.-

and lastly the famous greatest rosalind.

hahahaaa. crazy peeps.

you can obviously figure out now why my grades were like crap huh.

but at least then, i had a life.

A REAL LIFE.

i mean although i was fat , and knew im fat.

i'll still get up (:

k im lying, who the hell gets up with a smile.

at least i didnt hate school.

and at least when i go to school, i know han or pokes will be there.

and i can like immediately hang around , say hi to everyone,

sit on other people(girls of course)'s laps and run around.

look at what i have then, and now.

im like .______________________________________________________. everyday.

like forever .________________________________________________________.

k im doing it now.

people really think alot when they're alone.

forever alone. ahhahaha

2011-11-19T15:54:00.002+08:00

blogger changed a lil bit?
something's different , but i cant tell what.
ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
nope, still cant.

k anw.
had lessons yesterday.
lesson i meant.
8-10. supposedly 11. but ended early.
k so i dressed wierdly.
and met da at 1120am.
like just nice, cos he's always late . dohh.

we went to make a report.
stupid scammer.
hope she ...
nah. wont hope she dies , too mean.
hope she gets scammed too?
okay, so he brought me to msia.
like ''smuggle me to msia''
or kidnap. catnap. whatever.
we went to citysquare to eat.
and i forgot to buy nanonano. urgh.
wanted to watch movie.
happily thought breaking dawn came out yst.
umm yeah. in the US
we went to eat. had awefully sweet horlicks.
i feeel so ^^
like childhood feeling whenever i taste horlicks.
esp those not properly mixed and then mixed with ice.
so you can like chew on the lumpy lumpy stuff.
k no one gets its.
its okay, my blog.
shuddup. hahaha. mean (O:

yeah and then he drived me to his house.
like i thought i'll scream and die and everything.
but not really.
cos there was jam at the beggining.
he was the one screaming and everything.
like NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
-.-
and we had pillow fight in the car while he was driving.
thank goodness im still alive now and typing.
and it was raining.
and we bought doughnuts.
(O:
like 6 of it.
3 each so he wouldnt hog mine and i wouldnt hog his.
why would i? {:<

so we reached his house.
noisy dog.
i mean i really really really honestly love golden retrievers.
but his is the worst and scariest and biggest ever.
that dog barks and growls like a lion.
and it's kept in this really huge cage like a lion.
poor guy. but still. i dont really like dogs that bark.
esp chihwawas. eww.

k and we watched cloudy with a chance of meatballs.
and ate doughnuts.
cos like. nth to watch.
we watched it together in sec3.
surprisingly we're still laughing at the same stuff.
then we'll be like, ehhh. we laughed over this before.
WOLS.
what ta dooo.
and his parents came home and laughed.
cos we were watching kiddy shows and i was so into the movie i nearly forgot to say hi.
im so mean ):
and we had dinner at some cafe.
saw that barista doing latte art.
like jealous max.
i miss playing with the steamer.

MST's coming really really really soon.
like 3 weeks? 2.5 weeks?
i havent even gotten the hang of my modules and tests are here?
this is crap really.
november literally flies. literally.
its the 19th alr. that's crazy.
pros and cons ah.
k the only pro is allowance soon(O:
cons like everything else?
stupid.

k lah bye.
need to start revising.
esp on the IT based modules.
im like IT stupid. really.
all i know is facebook and temple run.
maybe a little bit of twitter and blogger.

ciao.

i mean k bye.

2011-11-16T11:08:00.002+08:00

its so early!
wednesday again, so my day's off.
awesome.

going back to bukit view later for band.
we're gna be the silver polish that helps .
right.
umm.
just wna perform with oli one last time.
lol you should have saw the mistake before i corrected it.
i spelled OIL.
haahaha.
umm. yeah
its been long , and i miss her loads!
plus her Os are over.
wthh.
like what the hewww.
its been one year alr?!
and i still get creeps when i go back for band.
cos i see jarod as the SL.
which is totally wrong.
he was like the small irritating guy back then.
and now he's in my position. how nice.
ah well. hey 11.11 ! make a wish.
crap. i feel so restless, distracted and hyper.
woohooo.
reminds me of last night during ''sectionals''
it ended with me attempting to throw a chair at minghui.
whadayewthinkkkk.

and my presentation's over yaw!.
screwed up attempt , i really got scared i kept stuttering.
and like when i slowly rmbed all the points,
eugene's phone vibrated and i forgot everything again.
yep. that's xiyu.
ok yeah. but its over.
and the lecturer said no one got Cs and Ds.
not like i hoping much for an A. duh.
k so im skipping tmr's tutorial. cos im alr done with my presentation.
and it's the continuation of over ppl's presentation.
sleeeeeep. gna go to school at like 11am. lika boss.
for the first time. damn it.

and thank marvin.
not gawd.
thank marvin for lending me his soft case.
ITS SOOO FLUFFFAAAY.
no not really.
its just friggin like.
guess its like less than 1000g. (1kg) hahaha
my case is like 5.1kg.
to make it look WHOA , its 5100g.
WHOAAAAAAAAAAAA.
heavy huh.
k sum ting wong with me.

aiyayayaa.
and sis is back from her op.
we shared the cheese popcorn
and yeah. she has no school too.
not like im gna wait on her the whole day.
im outta the house nigga.
and she's so mean.
just because she went for an op, she demands everything.
and gets it.
like usually she want this super duper expensive butter cookies from denmark?
like 9bucks for a tin. and mom will just ignore her (HAHA)
and i came home yst, 2 tins of butter cookies.
wts man. wts.
i wna go for an op too.
haha k no.

and btw, the presentation ended with my style.

''k bye''

2011-11-14T19:06:00.002+08:00

finally gotss nutella.
i feel awesome.
awefully lonesome.
like some forever alone kinda person?
no one then eat nutella. naise.
k.

bad monday.
bad bad monday.
well, gened first thing in the morning again.
monday blues ah.
sat with shafiqa in gened for the first time.
she's a terror serious.
she's vulgar and skinny and rude and vulgar.
in a good way.
how is that good.
but she's real nice. (cough)
and skinny. i couldnt help it k.
i was like umm, are you like 25kg?
she smacked me. ah well.
kinda fun sitting with her tho.
feel like there's finally a retard in my class that can connect with me.
hahaha. k sorry.

yeah other lessons were boring.
i would say, good sense of concentration today .
phew. gta catch up after those stonning and i-hate-my-life moments.
back on track woman, back on track.
and XX said my piercing was nice.
he's just gay.

k there's port operations presentation tmr.
which is why im blogging so much,
because im freaking out.
HELP ME ):
i will not see anyone tmr.
i see bears. only bears. and i will talk normally , with singlish.
i . am. okay.
yeah right, that's what i said that day before the skit.
before you know it , it was my turn like awkward silence for 3 mins?
nice life xiyu, nice life.

and umm, think im going msia with da on wed/fri?
the initial plan was wed. cos i dont have sch.
and then i suddenly rmb, oli's Os finish today.
and she's going back to band on wed.
NOOOO (*&#(*@&#@
yeah, so it's changed to friday, after stats.
*cross fingers*
stats please end early.

kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
listening to real emo songs and eating nutella.
i feel like laughing and crying at the same time.

bye lor.

Lifehouse - Somewhere Only We Know (Live @ Yahoo!)

2011-11-13T15:10:00.000+08:00

^^ old songs are still best.

2011-11-12T15:34:00.002+08:00

lazy crazy day.

i need to study.
still in bed.
haha.
okay, i got up real early.
to go to cousin's wedding.
went to church. like zommmg.
i never ever want to get married. it's like so scary.
and the tied down feeling forever.
doesnt feel good.
my cousin's so pretty tho.
(:
felt like orphans there tho.
cos oni sisters and i went.
my dad had to work. and mom's got smth on.
other ppl keep asking where's mom and dad.
and like where they go , send my regards blah blah blah.
dude, you're like gna see them at dinner later.
felt like crying lol.

okay anw, at night there's dinner at the restaurant.
so umm. yeah.
i cant seem to like blog about a long long long post.
my life's kinda empty you see.
just like the blog. and it's posts.

alright, gta catch up on studies.
bye nigga.

2011-11-11T23:34:00.002+08:00

k, like.
idk.
im so confused.
and like screwed up and everything?

i skipped lesson today.
cos i couldnt wake up.
and i didnt want to see you .
so im like dead cos its hard to catch up for 3 hours of statistics.
i'll try..

cousin's wedding tmr.
jeez. we're like not so close anw.
my sis's the 'flower girl'
seriously?
k ima laugh at her.
idk ah. or should i bring my notes to study.
that's plain stupid.

urghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
so frustrated.

k lah bye

2011-11-09T20:36:00.002+08:00

met up with rosalind just now.
and went for piercing. two.
i feel good.
i feel satisfied.
and i feel better.
i love her so much. seriously.

ah k. school tmr again.
feel like exams are over and its the holidays alr.
umm. stupid me.
and i talked with hannan on fb yst.
nice catching up . like finally.
he said he's 168 now.
thats like 10cm taller than me alr.
we used to be the same height. or he used to be shorter.
arsehole. im so pissed.
lol

i kinda feel inhumane.
okay i feel un-human rather.
no longer feel like a living person.
no meaning to be on this earth anw.

right. gotta get a point straight to myself.
that exams arent over.
okay.
bye.

The Click Five - Don't Let Me Go Official Video

2011-11-09T15:02:00.000+08:00

)':

2011-11-08T21:45:00.001+08:00

i enjoy the pain.

"Without You" AJ Rafael [Official Music Video]

2011-11-08T21:38:00.001+08:00

i didnt have the intent on any evil thoughts.
i just wanted to patch things up, and be friends.
just friends.
i found out today we'd be stuck in the same class for the next 2 years or so.
i cant take it being like this.

i really didnt..

2011-11-07T14:44:00.002+08:00

finally got up at 8am in the morning.

feel so energised alr.
k not. i just woke up from me nap.
naise.

okay, sis booked the court a few days back.
at like today, 9am.
okay, so we decided to take a 2km walk all the way to the mrt station.
-________-
tired. duh.
and we played badminton at the court.
for like an hour .
and she was pissed or smth?
she kept thrashing me.
very funny. now my armpits hurt max.
and we went to eat KFC breakfast after that.
not. i ate the 80cents honey biscuit.
and we ran 3km back home.
i dropped dead when i went home.
like really . on the floor. and i fell asleep.
so i just bathed. and dad's bringing me out.
feels like a sunday.
and a great day to put everything down.

i love sis.
ewww.

bye.

David Choi - Heart

2011-11-06T14:20:00.000+08:00

k , 'hi im david choi' please shuddup.
now im pissed , too.

2011-11-06T14:08:00.002+08:00

sneaky pooper.

having it kept altogether is real difficult.
great sunday .
3rd day rotting at home.
i'll give it my personal best record.
tmr's the 4th.
i promised sis to either tennis or smth with her.
if not we're going running, at 9am.
which is totally wrong for me.
i can just pull her leg and get dragged on the floor while she runs.
she has nice calf muscles now.
wierd to say this but yeah.
awesome sis.
she runs like 3 times a week, 10km each time.
dont know how she keeps up to it.
and she goes yoga as well. crazy.
i hope she gets married real soon and i get my own room.
k she doesnt have a bf.
sorry .

after 2 days of cooping myself in my own chicken coop.
or pigsty . a.k.a my room. guess i should start studying.
at least.
no motivation . but yeah.
gta force it on myself huh.
before i lose out to everyone else again,
like last sem.
dont wna end up going some unknown uni just because of my stupid probs.
not worth it.
well, easier said than done.

i had this wild thought of calling you last night,
and ask if you'd like to meet up.
i doubt you will.
plus, i should never be that selfish.
never.
go on, with your own life.
its supposed to be like that anw.
well then.
in with the new. i hope.

it get better woman, it gets better.

2011-11-05T15:33:00.003+08:00

cant get used to being stuck in that happiness?

well, try me.
not literally.

i woke up so early today.
at like 10am?
okay its not that early.
but i couldnt sleep, tossing and turning last night.
and if know me, i'd prolly sleep a couple more hours on such a saturday.
and tomorrow, and the day after.
this feeling is so sick.
well, at least now i've got the space i want.

some guy talked to me on fb last night.
giving me the wrong advices and everything.
idk, just feels wrong.
afterall, he wasnt truthful AT ALL when he was with my bestfriend.
and the kind of advice he gave me ,
was that every other guy would be the same as him,
and make the same decisions, lying other everything to get their own time.
part of me didnt believe anything.
yet , i thought through everything.
i dont know.

if i'd attempt to be thick,
i'd say '' dont mistake my kindness for my weakness''
i beg to differ, i'd like to correct kindness, for stupidity.
i really ponder over how much stupid-er i can get honestly.
saying , only you can make me blue .
its like putting myself into a pit of fire. plain stupid.
yet i still do it.
still, giving is better than getting.
its actually the willing receiver .
im so damn thick. and stupid.
i mean, if you were worth crying for,
you wouldnt even let me shed a tear right?
imbecile me.

headed to the gym.
how ironic that i felt like the treadmill itself.
my life just goes on and on
and no matter how hard i'll try or push myself forward,
i'll still be on the same spot and the end of the day
its a matter of choosing whether to stay at that spot or not.
im struggling. real bad.

practically threw my whole day away yesterday.
not gonna waste precious time before i start hyperventilating again.

everything's gna be,
well.. fine.
just fine.

David Choi - Love

2011-11-05T00:20:00.000+08:00

been listening to his songs so much,
everytime i play there's this
''hi im david choi''
and sis will shout ''SHUT THE HELL UP''

AJ Rafael - When We Say (Juicebox) - Official Music Video - Wong Fu Prod...

2011-11-04T18:36:00.000+08:00

kinda miss this song.
loads of songs make sense now.
so last year.
not so good-looking guy but he has awesome songs

2011-11-04T15:17:00.002+08:00

The worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and yet you know you can never have them.

humans are selfish.
i am human, so ?
yesterday could have been my worst day, ever.
in my entire 17 years and 1 month.

i dont know, i had a bad night.
had some nightmare of which i was on the cruise.
the same cruise, same life we took.
same deck. everything , same.
it felt like a re-enactment.
except for the part when i was left alone.
you can prolly feel it in my bones already right.
woke up and felt cranky.

so many things happening here.
why has to be me.
i have a heart too, like everybody else.
why me?
i feel so frustrated.
its as if there's some conspiracy against ,
i dont know? me?

i feel like im gna explode.
i feel angry. and i cant vent it out.
i cant even smile to tell others im alright.

i dont know.
everyone's leaving, no one cares, or you're taking everything away.
its an all-gone-wrong situation.
how do i even reach that stage of epiphany,
where i'll finally understand why these series of events happen to me,
not little by little, not one by one.
but all at the same time.
even if you had to throw some barriers or obstacles to me,
you wouldnt throw it at my face will ya?

im getting tired of this.
its really dramatic, i dont believe its true.
and now what?
even my passion's gone?

i wish i could tell you everything.
i wish you'd have that basic understanding of whats going on.
didnt even get a wink of sleep last night,
because i've been thinking.
what can i do other than cry?
i wish i didnt have to deserve this sometimes.

Granted, just an infinitely more mild version of the intended impact of that phrase.
everything fades, memories fade.
bullshit.
i hate everything.

please save me?

2011-11-02T15:41:00.001+08:00

it's been a couple of hours and im still lying in my bed thinking.

what in the world am i doing, seriously?
SHITE. i need motivation.
some studying should be going on or smth.

time to shake this off and get going woman.

2011-11-02T13:13:00.005+08:00

this is unbelievable.

okay, not i am.
like THIS is.
if you get what i meant.
the amount of self reproach i am going through is unpredictable.

where you'll just go back to where you belong.
and my life , social life, everything in general is close to NIL/NA.
kinda sucks huh.
all those little moments still tugs at my heartstrings.
i know when i've gone beyond the boundary,
but still..
its near impossible to put down that clamp on emotions
or the time limit on it.
how long has it been again?

day by day,
lessons through lessons i walk past you.
thinking will things ever be the same?
cant we at least remain as closest friends, forever?
i cant imagine if you'd ever approach me to stay out of your life.
feels like you'd do it anytime.
the insanity would be definately manifold.
come to think of it, i should be like
'' why would i even care?''
i beg to differ. i care.

y'know where the feeling accumulates in the chest.
all the imput.
not talking about the physicalities.
but at least yeah, all the imput.
and there's no outlet from my so-called chamber.
just slowly travels downwards and downwards.
halts. shivers. deepbreaths. cry . sleep. gone. im over it. repeat.

i wish i could be nonchalant about this.
the fact that i am not, partly shows i am human afterall.
and sorta kills me.
i have feelings too.
really sensitive ones.

if only i could just put everything down,
not waste my one-to-two hour of nothingness out of that precious 24hours a day
and stop dwelling about how things are bad as it is.

well, a rant is still a rant.
thank you blogger.
really appreciated it much.
rather than talking to that oversized bear whom does nothing but smile.
perfect day at home.
voluntary deprivation and captivity.
space and of course, a tinge of self reproach.

bye.

2011-11-02T00:00:00.002+08:00

my heart and my mind,
definately did not connect.

the first time in i have no idea how long
that i've had eye contact with you.
so badly wanted to at least say hi.
but there was this natural reaction.
what if that someone was behind you.
and like in an instant reaction my mind just said, RUN.
as usual.
i really did.
but that instant was captured in my head.
i can almost feel it now.
its the same as the other times when we used to hangout.
everything feels captured.
the shirt you wore, the stuff you were holding.
everything.

i dont know why.
really feel exhausted
tired of school and everything.
i feel so thankful that school's out for me tmr.
i feel so relieved.
sigh..
if only things werent so difficult.

bye

2011-10-31T19:22:00.002+08:00

one of the worst mondays ever.

felt so friggin exhausted.
so hard to stay awake for the second last lesson
and couldnt take it anymore,
so i went home without attending the last lesson.
kinda relieved i did, bet im gna die tmr
cos i cant catch up with lessons.
but hey, i'll try.

feel so disappointed and everything.
idk.
its just a typical one-of-the-many-days.
where i'll just feel empty.
again.

what's going on.

sometimes im in the bus on the way home
and i start to wonder,
did i even enjoy my day?
or just plain wasting my days with a fake smile.
at the end of the day i realise, as always.
i dont feel happy.
really hope i wont waste much of my life anymore.

alright.
blogging is the first step to wasting my time i tell yer.
band tmr.
not so enthusiastic.
gna be like tired.
look forward to wed then.
no-school-day.

(Y) , literally.

bye .

2011-10-30T19:31:00.002+08:00

Dear God,

why should life be so hard? why cant we all live happily, not work , not study.
just watch as the grass grow, and drink milk from cows from a straw.
why must life be so difficult?
why'd you know it's so hard for me to make friends,
and yet you make me find a friend, whom i thought i could rely on,
and take that friend away? i mean, if it's meant to be april fools,
its not really funny.
i wish life was better, much.

love.

its sunday alr.
i think , this is one of the fastest weekend ive experienced.
and tmr's monday.
here it goes again...
kinda dread going to school.
makes me feel miserable.
plus, gened's the first lesson.
makes me feel so useless.
guess what?
there's been 2 lessons so far.
and i've attended those 2 lessons.
and sp sent me a mail, warning me about my attendance for gened pitting below 75%?
you kidding me???
screw gened.
screw my life.
better be off doing nothing but stare and wait.

k bye.

2011-10-29T00:14:00.002+08:00

alright.

rainrainrainrain.
and im the only one awake.
finally, the weekends.
feels like the second weekend alr,
since wed was a holiday.

mixed feelings now.
da say its, rojak.
idk why.
day didnt start of well again , as usual.
had hard time getting out of bed.
eyes were ._. all the way till 10am at least.
had to go to school for stats. quite interestinggggg
until my friggin laptop decided to hang,
not cool at all.
i had to re-do everything.
and plus, da and i were abit cranky ah.
ok i was cranky.
ended up squabbling a lil.

went home, and watched teeveee.
awesome.
havent watch tv in years now.
(O:
yeah and head for bukitview.
it friggin rained once i attempted to step out of the house.
and jaron was like ()*)(#@*)*#)@!!
cos he was bored . damn bored.
and da called, said he's coming along too.
then i like, k lorrrrrrrrr. suibian.
wanted him to come badly tho.
waste of time to go back anw.
i got sammy wet. for nth.
stupid life.
turns out they were playing standard of excellence.
if you dont know what i mean, you'll be like wahhhh sound so cheam ah
its like doh doh doh re mi mi, re do re mi do. kinda thing.
zzzzzzzzzz
explored around school, went into classrooms.
and went home, da followed me home.
he actually volunteered to go up to my house to say hi to my mom.
end up he was stuffed with food , curry, noodles, 7-up.
hahahhahaaa.
and then we went for dinner.
he forced me to finish my rice, i didnt tho
felt kinda sick, i puked.
and my eyes were red.
he thought i cried lol.

k oh yeah,
forgot to mention.
im broke. officially.
the 200 bucks thing for the year?
im left with 16 bucks.
went to the docs with rosa yst.
and then we somemore go marche.
wts. hahaha.
k no lah, we bought the awesome bread.
and went to the basement restaurant to eat
and then bought awesome apple tea.
and had bread and butter pudding.
and took pictures. we must be crazy.
and we bused home.
i skipped band for the first time.
felt bad, but i had my reasons yaw.
the doc's was necessary.
marche is like the awesomest place ever.
i promise, after i work during the holidays and earn money,
i'll bring da there. his fav baked potato. yuck.
or yum. hahas

k lah, its only 1230am and i feel so damn tired alr.
gna be good this weekend and stay home.
rot at home. my forte (Y)

its smelly daren's birthday today!
HARPIY BIRSTDIY LONGDINGDONG.
HOAP YEW'LL RILLY HAF FON TOEDAE
AEND GREOW TALLER, AEND EET MOARE YEW WHORE.

k bye.